Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct word choice; remove hesitations and repetition, use a clear topic sentence and one or two supporting details with linking words. Also correct vocabulary mistakes (e.g., ‘flick through photos on my phone’ and ‘it brings back memories’). Keep answers to no more than 3–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different views. For example, I often take close-up shots of small details around my home because when I flick through the photos on my phone, they bring back vivid memories of that moment.

제안: Give a clear topic sentence and support it with two specific reasons using linking words. Avoid filler phrases and grammar errors (subject-verb agreement, article use). Use precise vocabulary (e.g., ‘pollution’, ‘stargazing’, ‘I'm into nature’). Limit to 2–3 sentences.

예시: I prefer views in rural areas because cities have high air pollution, which obscures the stars, and I enjoy natural scenery. Therefore, I like photographing mountains, rivers, and forests when I travel to the countryside.

제안: Make your main point direct, then provide one specific reason and an example. Avoid repetition and general words like ‘stuff’; use precise nouns (‘canyons’, ‘waterfalls’). Use linking words such as ‘because’ or ‘for example’ and keep it to 2–3 sentences.

예시: I prefer views in other countries because unfamiliar landscapes excite me. For example, I enjoy photographing canyons and waterfalls abroad since they are very different from the scenery in my country.

× I like to take pictures of different, different view views, even if it's something really small around me or my surroundings.

✓ I like to take pictures of different views, even if they are something really small around me or in my surroundings.

The sentence repeats words ('different, different' and 'view views') and has inconsistent number agreement ('it's' with plural 'views'). This is a sentence structure and subject-verb agreement issue. Suggestion: remove duplicate words, use the plural form 'views' and match the pronoun to plural: 'they are' or change to singular consistently.

× Because when I flick flick your bathroom in my phone and then I see those pictures, I suddenly can't that flashback to that moment.

✓ Because when I flick through photos on my phone and then I see those pictures, I suddenly get a flashback to that moment.

This sentence contains repetition ('flick flick'), wrong object ('your bathroom'), incorrect verb phrase ('can't that flashback') and collocation errors. Use the phrasal verb 'flick through' or 'scroll through', refer to 'photos' or 'pictures' on my phone, and use 'get a flashback' to express experiencing a memory. Also keep tense consistent.

× I prefer views in rural areas because the air pollution in city areas are quite high and then I can't catch any stars in the sky and then I'm kind of the person the quite into nature I believe.

✓ I prefer views in rural areas because air pollution in cities is quite high, so I can't see any stars in the sky, and I'm the kind of person who is quite into nature, I believe.

Multiple issues: 'in city areas are' has subject-verb agreement and article problems and incorrect preposition use; 'catch any stars' is colloquial and better as 'see any stars'; 'the person the quite into nature' is incorrect pronoun and relative clause structure. Corrections: use plural 'cities' with singular verb 'is' for 'air pollution' as a singular noun, use 'see' for stars, and use the relative clause 'the kind of person who is'.

× And then so I like to take pictures of nature, mountains, river, that kind of stuff.

✓ So I like to take pictures of nature: mountains, rivers, and similar scenes.

The list mixes singular and plural forms ('mountains, river') and uses informal 'that kind of stuff'. Use consistent pluralization for items in a list ('rivers') and clearer phrasing such as 'and similar scenes' or 'and so on'.

× Well, to be honest, I prefer views in other countries because it's unfamiliar to me, because I don't get to see them quite often in my own country, whereas these stuff are new to me.

✓ Well, to be honest, I prefer views in other countries because they are unfamiliar to me; I don't get to see them often in my own country, whereas these things are new to me.

'It's unfamiliar' incorrectly uses singular 'it' for plural 'views' — use 'they are'. 'These stuff' is ungrammatical; use 'these things' or 'this stuff' (with singular mass noun). Also 'don't get to see them quite often' can be simplified to 'don't get to see them often'.

× And the landscapes, maybe the canyons, the waterfall, it's different from my country.

✓ The landscapes, like canyons and waterfalls, are different from those in my country.

This sentence mixes singular and plural forms and uses 'it's' for plural subjects. Use plural consistent nouns ('canyons and waterfalls') and match the verb 'are'. Also replace 'different from my country' with 'different from those in my country' for clarity.