Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, correct grammar (e.g. take pictures, I take selfies), and limit length to 2–4 sentences. Add a specific detail or example using linking words to sound coherent (for example: 'For instance, I photographed the sunrise at...').

예시: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views. For example, when I visit mountain areas I often take landscape photos and a few selfies to remember the trip, because photos help me recall the atmosphere and scenery later.

제안: Reduce hesitations and organize ideas: give a clear topic sentence of preference, then add 1–2 specific reasons using linking words (because, when, for example). Correct grammar (rural areas, atmosphere) and avoid repeating phrases. Keep it within 2–3 sentences.

예시: I prefer views in rural areas because the mornings there are peaceful and full of greenery. For example, the cold morning air and sunrise in the countryside make me feel relaxed and as if I'm in a different country.

제안: Answer the question directly first (I prefer views in my own country) and then give concise, specific reasons with correct grammar. Clarify place names and avoid unclear phrases. Use linking words (because, for example) and limit to 2–3 sentences.

예시: I prefer views in my own country because there are beautiful sunrise spots in eastern Nepal, such as Ilam, known for its tea gardens and cool mornings. For example, the sunrise over the hills there attracts many domestic and international tourists and gives me a peaceful experience.

× I like to take a picture of different views.

✓ I like to take pictures of different views.

The noun 'picture' should be plural 'pictures' because 'different views' implies multiple items; use plural to match plurality.

× Whenever I visit a different place like a mountain area or the greenery place, I definitely click and selfie or the view in my mobile phone because it takes a memory and keeps memorable journey in our smartphone which will be easy to recall.

✓ Whenever I visit places like mountain areas or green places, I definitely take selfies or photos of the view on my phone because they capture memories and keep a memorable record on my smartphone that is easy to recall.

Several errors: 'click and selfie' is incorrect collocation—use 'take selfies or photos'. 'The greenery place' should be 'green places'. 'It takes a memory' is incorrect verb and singular—use 'they capture memories'. 'Keeps memorable journey' needs noun phrase: 'keep a memorable record'. Use plural pronouns consistently ('they' for selfies/photos). Use correct prepositions: 'on my phone'.

× the greenery place

✓ green places

Using 'the' and 'place' is awkward and ungrammatical here. Remove 'the' and use plural 'places' for general meaning; use adjective 'green' rather than noun 'greenery' as a modifier.

× it takes a memory and keeps memorable journey in our smartphone which will be easy to recall

✓ they capture memories and keep a memorable record on our smartphones that are easy to recall

Use present simple 'capture' and 'keep' for habitual actions. 'Takes a memory' is incorrect—use 'capture memories'. 'Memorable journey' should be 'memorable record' or 'memories'. Match plural 'smartphones' or 'my smartphone' and ensure relative clause agrees.

× To be honest, umm, the view is always good in rural area.

✓ To be honest, the view is usually better in rural areas.

Use plural 'rural areas' for generalization. Use comparative 'better' if contrasting with urban areas, and 'usually' fits better than 'always'.

× So it's like in morning sunrise because of its greenery place and the good atmos, cold atmosphere it makes, I mean it, I mean it feels, it makes us feel more comfortable and feels like we're in different place or the different country due to the environment of rural area in urban area.

✓ So I prefer the morning sunrise because of the greenery and the cool atmosphere; it makes us feel more comfortable and as if we are in a different place or even a different country due to the rural environment.

Many issues: 'in morning sunrise' should be 'the morning sunrise'. 'Greenery place' -> 'greenery' or 'the greenery'. 'Good atmos, cold atmosphere' -> 'cool atmosphere'. Remove repeated fillers. 'Feels like we're in different place' -> 'as if we are in a different place'. Use 'rural environment' not 'rural area in urban area'.

× It definitely attract the domestic and international tourists for sunrise view and the greenery place.

✓ It definitely attracts domestic and international tourists for the sunrise view and the greenery.

Subject-verb agreement: 'It' requires 'attracts' (third person singular). Also remove 'the' before 'domestic and international tourists' is optional; add 'the' before 'sunrise view' and use 'greenery' as noun.

× It definitely attract the domestic and international tourists for sunrise view and the greenery place.

✓ It definitely attracts domestic and international tourists for the sunrise view and the greenery.

The verb 'attract' must agree with singular subject 'it'; add -s to form 'attracts'.

× Actually I'm a big fan of Sunrise which is located at the eastern part of Nepal in Elam and which is usually called in Sri on two place.

✓ Actually, I'm a big fan of the sunrise at the eastern part of Nepal in Ilam, which is often called '...' locally.

Original sentence is unclear and ungrammatical. 'Sunrise which is located' is wrong because a sunrise is not located; better say 'the sunrise at Ilam in eastern Nepal'. 'Elam' likely 'Ilam'. 'which is usually called in Sri on two place' is unintelligible; clarify local name if known. Fix sentence structure and proper nouns.

× I prefer to visit own country because I'm not busy at all the place there.

✓ I prefer to visit my own country because I'm not very busy there.

Use possessive 'my own country' and correct preposition placement: 'busy there' not 'busy at all the place there'. Remove 'at all the place'. Use 'very' or 'not very busy' for clarity.