Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes/No and reason), avoid unclear phrases and repetition, correct grammar and word choice (e.g., "graphic" → "photography"), and finish with a brief supporting detail. Keep it under five sentences and use linking words for clarity.

예시: Yes, I enjoy taking photographs of nature. I especially like plants, mountains and animals because I find their shapes and colors interesting. Also, I often try different angles to see which shot looks best, and I sometimes take several photos so I don't miss a good one.

제안: Answer directly then give two clear reasons with linking words. Correct grammar ("I prefer rural areas"), avoid repetition, and use more natural phrases ("gives me a relaxed feeling"). Keep it under five sentences and provide specific examples of what you enjoy.

예시: I prefer rural areas to urban ones. Firstly, rural places have more greenery and fresh air, which makes me feel relaxed. Secondly, I enjoy seeing wildlife and wide landscapes during summer breaks because they help me reduce stress and recharge.

제안: State your preference clearly, then give two to three specific details. Fix grammar and word choice ("I prefer views in my own country"; "produces" not "products"). Use linking words to connect ideas and keep sentences concise.

예시: I prefer views in my own country. For example, rural Mongolia has vast landscapes, grazing livestock and high mountains surrounded by green forests. In addition, there are many berry-filled bushes and deep clear lakes, which I find very beautiful and make me proud of my country.

× Honestly I'm not into about a graphic but I like taking pictures of plants and mountains, animals and nature from a different views to see how could it come out and if I missed it, missed the uh.

✓ Honestly I'm not into photography, but I like taking pictures of plants, mountains, animals and nature from different views to see how they come out and if I miss anything.

Multiple preposition and word choice errors: 'into about a graphic' is incorrect; use 'into photography' or 'interested in photography'. 'From a different views' should be 'from different views' (plural noun with no article). 'How could it come out' should be 'how they come out' to match subject and natural word order. 'If I missed it, missed the uh' should be 'if I miss anything' for present tense and clarity. Suggestions: replace incorrect phrases with 'into photography', remove unnecessary articles, ensure subject-verb agreement and use present simple for habitual actions.

× In city there's a lot of buildings rather than green areas.

✓ In the city there are a lot of buildings and fewer green areas.

Missing article 'the' before 'city' and incorrect comparative connector 'rather than' creates unclear meaning. Also 'a lot of buildings' requires plural verb 'there are' (subject-verb agreement). Use 'fewer' to compare countable nouns. Suggestion: add 'the', use 'there are', and 'fewer green areas' for clarity.

× Personally I love nature, animals and plants and like enjoying my time in a summer break so I prepare rural areas.

✓ Personally, I love nature, animals and plants, and I enjoy spending my summer break in rural areas.

Pronoun and verb issues: 'like enjoying my time in a summer break' is awkward; use 'enjoy spending my summer break'. 'I prepare rural areas' is incorrect—'prepare' is wrong verb; use 'spend time in' or 'go to'. Suggestion: use 'I enjoy spending my summer break in rural areas' and include commas for clarity.

× It gives me it gives me comfortable vibe and improve my mood and release stress.

✓ It gives me a comfortable vibe, improves my mood and relieves my stress.

Repeated phrase 'It gives me' should appear once. Missing article 'a' before 'comfortable vibe'. Verb forms must agree with singular subject: 'improve' and 'release' should be 'improves' and 'relieves'. 'Relieve stress' commonly uses 'relieves my stress'. Suggestion: use singular verbs for singular subject and include appropriate articles.

× I prepare my own countries view, the rural areas of Mongolia has a vast landscape with the livestock and high mountains with full of green trees and that products many different kind of berries and deep lakes.

✓ I prefer the views of my own country. The rural areas of Mongolia have vast landscapes with livestock and high mountains full of green trees, and they produce many different kinds of berries and contain deep lakes.

Many issues: 'prepare' is wrong verb; should be 'prefer'. 'my own countries view' needs possessive and plural corrections: 'the views of my own country' or 'my own country's views'. Subject-verb agreement: 'the rural areas ... has' should be 'have'. 'with the livestock' -> 'with livestock' (no article). 'with full of green trees' -> 'full of green trees' (remove 'with'). 'that products' -> 'that produce' (correct verb and subject agreement). 'many different kind of berries' -> 'many different kinds of berries' (plural 'kinds' and plural noun agreement). Suggestions: use correct verbs (prefer, have, produce), correct articles, and plural forms where needed.