Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Reduce hesitations and use a clear topic sentence. Keep answer concise (max 5 sentences) and correct tense errors. Add one specific detail about what kinds of views you like and why to make it more engaging. Use linking words to connect ideas (for example, 'when' or 'so').

예시: Yes, I do. When I was a child I wanted to become a photographer, so I enjoy taking interesting and attractive photos of landscapes and city scenes. For example, I like capturing sunrise light because it creates warm colors and strong shadows that make photos more dramatic.

제안: Start with a direct topic sentence stating your preference, then give two specific reasons with linking words (because, for example). Avoid vague phrases and repeating fillers. Be more precise about what you like in rural views (e.g., meadows, forests, rivers).

예시: I prefer rural areas because they have lush green fields and peaceful natural scenery. For example, I enjoy photographing rivers and meadows at golden hour, since the soft light and open space create a calming atmosphere in the images.

제안: Give a clear topic sentence stating your preference and correct grammatical errors (use present simple). Replace unclear words ('wheels') and remove filler words. Provide specific examples of places or types of scenery in your country to support your answer. Use a linking word to add an example (for instance, 'for example').

예시: I prefer views in my own country because Iran has a wide variety of landscapes. For example, I like photographing the Zagros Mountains and the green meadows in the north, since their dramatic peaks and seasonal colors make for striking panoramic photos.

× because when I was child, I'd like to become a photographer when I grew up.

✓ because when I was a child, I wanted to become a photographer when I grew up.

The original uses 'was child' which is missing the article 'a' and mixes conditional/modal 'I'd like' with past context. Use simple past 'wanted' to match 'when I was a child' and add the article 'a'. Suggestion: add appropriate articles and keep tense consistent: 'when I was a child, I wanted to become a photographer.'

× So uh, I like to color pictures of different views and uh, take uh, interesting and attractive photos by myself.

✓ So, I like coloring pictures of different views and taking interesting and attractive photos myself.

After 'like' both 'to' infinitive and -ing form can be used, but using -ing ('coloring', 'taking') produces parallel structure. 'By myself' is wordy; 'myself' is more natural. Suggestion: use parallel gerunds for clarity: 'I like coloring... and taking... myself.'

× I prefer using rural areas.

✓ I prefer rural areas.

The verb 'prefer' normally takes a noun directly; 'using' is unnecessary and awkward. Remove 'using' to make the sentence natural. Suggestion: say 'I prefer rural areas.' or 'I prefer to visit rural areas.' depending on intent.

× I think umm, it would be full of lush green areas and uh, when you see the photos and views, it's full of fresh air that umm, instilled in you even by looking at the photos.

✓ I think they are full of lush green areas, and when you see photos of them you can almost feel the fresh air.

The original mixes singular/plural and uses awkward clauses: 'it would be full' (unclear subject), 'photos and views' redundant, and 'instilled in you even by looking at the photos' is unidiomatic. Correct by making plural subject 'they' (rural areas), simplifying clauses, and using natural phrasing 'you can almost feel the fresh air.' Suggestion: keep subject consistent and use natural expressions for sensory impressions.

× Uh, I live in Iran that it is a vast country.

✓ I live in Iran; it is a vast country.

Using 'that' to connect the clauses is incorrect. Use a semicolon, period, or 'which' ('Iran, which is a vast country') to add the description. Suggestion: 'I live in Iran; it is a vast country.' or 'I live in Iran, which is a vast country.'

× I like photos, uh, in my country because there are many, uh, nice panoramic views in my country W meadows or beautiful mountains.

✓ I like photos from my country because there are many nice panoramic views such as meadows and beautiful mountains.

The original repeats 'in my country' and contains a stray 'W' and poor list structure. Rephrase to avoid repetition and present examples with 'such as'. Suggestion: '...many nice panoramic views such as meadows and mountains.'

× I like wheels in my country.

✓ I like hills in my country.

'Wheels' is likely a mistaken word choice; 'hills' fits context of landscapes (meadows, mountains). Also ensure plural noun matches 'I like'. Suggestion: choose semantically appropriate noun: 'hills' or 'rivers' depending on intended meaning.