Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 回答は意図が分かるが、文法・語順・語彙の誤りが多く、発話に無駄な繰り返しや曖昧な語があるため、より自然で正確な文を練習してください。具体的には主語＋述語の構造を明確にし、不要な繰り返し（"architecture architect picture" や "I love to taking picture"）を避け、正しい動詞の形（"take pictures"）や前置詞（"on a trip"）を使う練習をしましょう。また、短めの文で一つの主張をし、その後に一つか二つの具体例を追加する構成を意識してください。

예시: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different scenes. I especially like photographing architecture because I travel often and buildings show local history and design. For example, I took many pictures of old temples when I visited Kyoto.

제안: 答えは明確で理由も述べているが、語順と冠詞の誤り（"urban area" → "an urban area"）、冗長な発話（"Uh"）が目立ちます。リンク語（"because", "so"）を使って理由を自然に繋げ、具体的な描写（どのようにリラックスするか）を加えると説得力が増します。文は2〜3文にまとめ、語彙を少し広げて表現力を上げましょう。

예시: I prefer rural views to urban ones because living in a city makes me appreciate quiet landscapes. The countryside relaxes me and gives me better opportunities to photograph nature, like fields and rivers.

제안: 意図は伝わるが、文法ミスと優柔不断な言い回し（"I since I or uh"）が多く、具体性がやや不足しています。より明確な主張（"I prefer photographing scenes in other countries"）を先に述べ、その後に具体例（訪れた国と何を撮ったか、どのように違うか）を一つ加える練習をしてください。接続詞（"because", "for example"）で理由と例をつなぐと流れが良くなります。

예시: I prefer photographing views in other countries because they often offer unfamiliar architecture and landscapes. For example, I photographed ancient ruins in Egypt and unique desert scenes in Jordan, which I couldn't find at home.

× Yes, architecture architect picture different views.

✓ Yes, I like to take pictures of different types of architecture.

The original sentence lacks a subject and proper verb structure, and repeats similar nouns unnaturally. Use subject 'I', verb phrase 'like to take pictures of', and noun phrase 'different types of architecture' to make a clear, grammatical sentence. Suggestion: include the subject and a complete verb phrase and choose one clear noun phrase (architecture or buildings).

× Uh, this is because I sometimes go to trip and I love to taking picture such as Wilder heritage.

✓ This is because I sometimes go on trips and I love taking pictures of world heritage sites.

Errors: 'go to trip' should be 'go on trips' (correct preposition and plural); 'I love to taking' mixes infinitive and gerund—use 'love taking' or 'love to take'; 'picture' should be plural 'pictures'; 'Wilder heritage' is likely 'world heritage' or 'world heritage sites'. Suggestion: use correct prepositions ('go on trips'), consistent verb forms ('love taking' or 'love to take'), and correct nouns ('world heritage sites').

× Uh, since I currently live in urban area, I would like to take picture in rural area.

✓ Since I currently live in an urban area, I would like to take pictures in rural areas.

Missing articles: use 'an urban area' with the indefinite article before singular countable noun. Also 'take picture' should be plural 'take pictures' for general activity, and 'rural area' is better plural 'rural areas' or 'the countryside'. Suggestion: include appropriate articles ('a/an/the') for singular countable nouns and use plural when speaking generally about activities across many places.

× Uh, rural area helps my mind more flexible and relaxed.

✓ Rural areas help my mind become more flexible and relaxed.

'Helps my mind more flexible' incorrectly places the adjective after the verb without a linking verb; use 'help...become' or 'make my mind more flexible'. Also use plural 'rural areas' for general statement. Suggestion: use a causative or linking structure ('help my mind become' or 'make me feel') and match singular/plural as needed.

× Ah, I since I or uh, while I love to go on trip, uh, such as Egypt and Jordan so I would prefer photographing other countries.

✓ Since I love to travel to countries such as Egypt and Jordan, I would prefer photographing other countries.

Original has disfluencies and incorrect phrase 'go on trip' (should be 'travel' or 'go on trips'). 'Since I love to travel to countries such as Egypt and Jordan' is a clear subordinate clause; then main clause 'I would prefer photographing other countries.' Suggestion: remove filler words, use 'travel' and plural 'countries', and structure the sentence with a clear subordinate clause followed by the main clause.