Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Make the response more concise and natural: begin with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, and add one specific example with a linking word. Keep within 3–4 sentences. Also correct slight grammatical errors (e.g., “helps you capture moments” not “capture that moment” and “recharge” instead of “rebreathe”).

예시: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views because photography helps me capture memorable moments. For example, when I visit the coast I photograph the sunrise to remember the colours and atmosphere. Moreover, taking landscape photos relaxes me and helps me recharge after a busy week.

제안: Start with a clear topic sentence and use linking words to explain reasons. Avoid vague statements and incorrect collocations (e.g., “high landscapes” is odd). Provide one specific contrastive detail and keep to 2–3 sentences.

예시: I prefer rural views because I enjoy natural scenery and open spaces. For example, unlike Manila with its skyscrapers and dense traffic, the countryside offers green fields and quiet trails where I can relax and take better photographs.

제안: Give a direct topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail and a linking word. Avoid overly long political commentary—focus on scenery and personal preference and mention accessibility briefly. Use clearer phrasing (e.g., “government spending” or “tourism infrastructure”).

예시: I prefer the views in my own country because the Philippines has diverse and stunning landscapes, from beaches to mountains. However, I think tourism infrastructure could be improved, for instance better roads and signs would make some remote spots easier for visitors to reach.

× I do like taking pictures in general.

✓ I do like taking pictures in general.

No correction needed; sentence is grammatical. 'Taking' is correctly used as a gerund/present participle to describe the activity of photographing.

× I believe that taking pictures is something is an activity that helps you capture that moment and lets you look back into that moment.

✓ I believe that taking pictures is an activity that helps you capture the moment and lets you look back on it.

Original sentence has a redundant 'is something is' and awkward preposition use. This is a sentence structure error (type 26) and also involves incorrect preposition choice. Remove the duplicate words, use 'the moment' (definite article for a specific moment) and 'look back on it' (correct prepositional phrase). Suggestion: simplify clauses to avoid repetition and use appropriate prepositions.

× Also, taking pictures of different landscapes will help me more relax and rebreathe from time to time.

✓ Also, taking pictures of different landscapes helps me relax and recharge from time to time.

Original uses 'help me more relax' and 'rebreathe', which are incorrect forms. This is a verb form and word choice issue (types 8 and 13). Use 'helps me relax' (correct infinitive structure with 'help' + base verb) and 'recharge' instead of the nonstandard 'rebreathe'. Use simple present for habitual action.

× A lot of our cities in the Philippines are more built with high landscapes, infrastructures, skyscrapers.

✓ Many of our cities in the Philippines are built with tall buildings, infrastructure, and skyscrapers.

Original has awkward phrase 'more built with high landscapes' and incorrect pluralization and word choice. This is a sentence structure and word choice error (type 26 and 13). 'Many' is more natural than 'A lot of' before plural noun; 'tall buildings' and 'skyscrapers' convey meaning; 'infrastructure' is usually uncountable. Rearranged for clarity.

× With that, a lot of people would like to see the greeneries, the nature and engage with the environment in general.

✓ Because of that, many people would like to see greenery, nature, and engage with the environment in general.

'Greeneries' is a nonstandard plural (article error/type 22 and 13). Use 'greenery' (uncountable) and omit 'the' before 'nature' when speaking generally. Also replace 'a lot of' with 'many' for formality and consistency.

× I really love the views in my own country.

✓ I really love the views in my own country.

Sentence is grammatical; present tense 'love' correctly expresses a general preference. No change needed.

× I believe the Philippines is one of the richest countries in terms of the beautiful landscapes and nature in general.

✓ I believe the Philippines is one of the richest countries in terms of beautiful landscapes and nature in general.

Remove 'the' before 'beautiful landscapes' because we speak generally (article error/type 22). 'Nature in general' is fine without 'the'.

× It's just that our government does not allocate enough budget to help it improve more and develop more so that it's more accessible to foreigners.

✓ It's just that our government does not allocate enough budget to help it improve and develop so that it becomes more accessible to foreigners.

Original uses 'help it improve more and develop more' which is redundant and awkward. This involves incorrect auxiliary/modal usage and sentence structure (types 4 and 26). Remove redundant 'more', use parallel verbs 'improve and develop', and use 'becomes' to indicate resulting accessibility. Also 'allocate enough budget' is acceptable but consider 'allocate enough funding' for naturalness.