Travelling— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve clarity, grammar and coherence. Start with a direct topic sentence, correct verb forms and word choices, avoid repetition, and add one specific detail using a linking word. Keep it within 3–4 sentences. For example, replace ‘which engaging me a lot’ with a reason phrase and remove duplicated words like ‘like like’.

예시: Yes, I always look out the window when I travel by bus or car because I enjoy watching the landscape. For example, I like to observe changing fields and small villages as we pass them, which helps me relax. Also, I prefer window seats because I don’t have to be close to other passengers.

제안: Make the response more concise and grammatically correct. Begin with a direct sentence, correct noun-verb agreement and awkward phrases (‘favorite hobbies is’ → ‘my favorite hobby is’). Use a linking word to add a specific example of what you photograph. Keep to 2–3 sentences and avoid filler words like ‘like’.

예시: Yes, I often take photos outside the car window because my favorite hobby is photography. For instance, I usually photograph interesting buildings and rural scenes to look back on later.

제안: Give a direct preference statement, then add one or two specific reasons using linking words. Remove fillers (‘uh’, ‘too’) and colloquial phrases (‘my cup of tea’) unless used appropriately. One clear example strengthens the response.

예시: I prefer the sea because I enjoy its open views and relaxing atmosphere. Also, since I like swimming, the beach gives me a chance to exercise and unwind after a busy week.

× Absolutely, this is one of my most favorite parts during the trip, which engaging me a lot.

✓ Absolutely, this is one of my favorite parts of the trip, which engages me a lot.

Errors: 'most favorite' is redundant; use 'favorite'. 'during the trip' is less natural than 'of the trip'. 'which engaging me' lacks a conjugated verb and wrong form; use 'which engages me' for correct subject-verb agreement and present tense. Suggestion: remove redundant modifiers, use correct verb forms and ensure the relative clause has a finite verb.

× I feel so comfortable whether when I don't have to expose to a lot of people around and really like like to nature.

✓ I feel so comfortable when I don't have to be exposed to a lot of people around and I really like being in nature.

Errors: 'whether when' is incorrect and redundant; use 'when'. 'don't have to expose to' uses incorrect voice and missing object; use passive 'be exposed to'. Double 'like like' is a repetition. 'to nature' needs verb form: 'being in nature' or 'go to nature' is unnatural. Suggestion: remove redundant words, use passive where appropriate, and use gerund ('being') after 'like'.

× Yes, of course, it is mainly because that my favorite hobbies is taking photos, so I really want to capture everything around me with like to review and take it as a memory for the future.

✓ Yes, of course. It is mainly because my favorite hobby is taking photos, so I really want to capture everything around me to review later and keep it as a memory for the future.

Errors: 'because that' is wrong; use 'because' or 'the reason is that'. 'favorite hobbies is' mixes plural and singular; use singular 'hobby is' or plural 'hobbies are'. 'with like to review' is ungrammatical; use 'to review later'. 'take it as a memory' is awkward; 'keep it as a memory' or 'keep it as a memento' is better. Suggestion: ensure subject and verb agree, choose correct article/number for 'hobby', and use clear infinitive phrases for purpose.

× I would prefer the sea since it's really vast and clear with a lot of water around.

✓ I would prefer the sea since it's really vast and clear and has a lot of water.

Errors: 'with a lot of water around' is redundant because the sea is inherently water; phrasing is awkward. Use 'and has a lot of water' or simply 'because it's vast and clear'. Suggestion: avoid redundant descriptions and place adverbs/phrases where they clearly modify the intended element.

× I'm also into swimming too, so uh, the sea would be my cup of tea.

✓ I'm also into swimming, so the sea would be my cup of tea.

Errors: 'also' and 'too' together are redundant; use one. Fillers like 'uh' are unnecessary in a prepared answer. Suggestion: remove redundant adverbs and fillers for clarity.

× That is my answer, thank you.

✓ That's my answer. Thank you.

Errors: comma splice and slightly informal punctuation. Better to separate into two short sentences: 'That's my answer. Thank you.' Suggestion: use concise sentence boundaries for clarity and natural speech.