Building— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Make your answer more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid repetition and fix tense/word order errors. Use linking words like "for example" or "also" to connect ideas.

예시: Yes. I live in Dubai, and the Burj Khalifa is very close to my home. For example, I can see the tower clearly from the roof of my building, and there are several other tall skyscrapers nearby.

제안: Be more focused and avoid repeating words like "beautiful" and "very." Give one clear reason and a specific example of when you take photos. Use linking words such as "because" or "for example" to structure your answer.

예시: Yes, I enjoy photographing nearby landmarks such as the Burj Khalifa and Burj Al Arab because they look spectacular at sunset. For example, last week I took several photos during golden hour and the colours made the buildings stand out.

제안: Remove hesitations and make one direct statement. Give one or two brief reasons why you want to visit and add a linking word like "because" or "because of". Keep it to two or three sentences maximum.

예시: Yes, I would love to visit the Eiffel Tower in France because it is an iconic landmark and I want to see Paris from above. Visiting it has been my dream for many years.

제안: Begin with a clear affirmative sentence and avoid informal fillers like "Guess." Give a specific reason and one supporting detail. Use linking words like "because" or "so" to connect ideas and correct grammar (e.g. "at a height" → "high up").

예시: Yes, I would like to live in a tall building in the future because I enjoy the views. For instance, living high up would allow me to see the city skyline and feel more private.

× Yes like I am currently I am living in Dubai and Burj Khalifa is the tallest building is near to my home and I can we I can get a clear beautiful view of the Burj Khalifa from my building, top of the building and it's very near to my building and many other tall buildings are also near my building.

✓ Yes, I currently live in Dubai and the Burj Khalifa, the tallest building, is near my home. I can get a clear, beautiful view of the Burj Khalifa from the top of my building, and many other tall buildings are also near my building.

The original sentence uses an awkward continuous form 'I am currently I am living' and repeats verbs, causing tense and structure problems. Use the simple present 'I currently live' for a permanent situation. Remove redundant words ('is' repeated) and add articles and commas for clarity. Break into shorter sentences to improve readability. Suggestion: Use simple present for general facts and avoid repeating phrases; place commas around appositives ('the Burj Khalifa, the tallest building,') and combine related ideas into clear sentences.

× Yes, I love to take pictures of the buildings like Burj Khalifa, Burj Al Arab that are near to my home.

✓ Yes, I love to take pictures of buildings like the Burj Khalifa and Burj Al Arab that are near my home.

The phrase 'near to my home' is nonstandard; use 'near my home'. Also add the definite article 'the' before named landmarks and use 'and' instead of a comma before the last item. Suggestion: Use 'near' without 'to' and include articles for specific landmarks.

× And when the climate and the weather and the scene is very beautiful, like sunsets, it's very beautiful to see that and the the photographs at that time turn out very beautiful.

✓ When the weather and the scene are very beautiful, such as during sunsets, it's lovely to watch, and the photographs taken then turn out very well.

Use 'weather and scene are' (plural subject requires plural verb). Avoid repeating words ('the the', 'very beautiful' repeated). Replace vague 'turn out very beautiful' with 'turn out very well' or 'turn out beautifully'. Suggestion: Match subject-verb number and vary vocabulary to avoid repetition.

× Yes, uh, I prefer to visit. I like to visit someday, uh, uh, Eiffel Tower and it's my biggest dream to visit there in France.

✓ Yes, I would like to visit the Eiffel Tower someday; it is my biggest dream to go there in France.

'Prefer to visit' is incomplete and awkward here; use 'would like to visit' to express desire. Place the article 'the' before 'Eiffel Tower'. 'Visit there in France' is redundant—use 'go there' or 'visit it in France.' Suggestion: Use 'would like' for polite future desire and include the definite article for famous landmarks.

× Guess someday in future I love to live in the tall buildings and love to live at the height so all the other buildings could seem small from there up.

✓ I guess that someday in the future I would love to live in a tall building and live at a height so that the other buildings would seem small from up there.

Mixing present 'I love' with future intention is incorrect. Use 'would love' or 'would like' for future desires. 'In the tall buildings' should be 'in a tall building' for a general wish. 'From there up' is awkward—use 'from up there.' Also use 'so that' to introduce purpose/result. Suggestion: Use conditional/future modal ('would') for wishes and rephrase for clarity.