Hobby— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is clear and relevant, and you give a topic sentence plus supporting details. To improve, make sentences more concise, vary vocabulary (avoid repetition like “hobbies” and “prefer” close together), and add a linking phrase to connect your ideas smoothly. Also consider giving a brief specific example to make the response more vivid.

예시: I enjoy several creative hobbies. For example, I love reading—especially fantasy and nonfiction—because they let me explore new ideas. I also cook and bake, mostly savory dishes; last weekend I made a spicy chicken pie that turned out well.

제안: This response follows the basic structure and gives specific supporting detail (anime and comics). To improve further, add a clear linking word when moving from past to present (e.g., "although" or "nowadays") and shorten phrases like "I still love to doodle now and then" to be more natural. You could also mention a brief example of a memorable drawing to enrich content.

예시: As a child I loved drawing, often copying characters from anime and comics. Although I still doodle occasionally now, I don't spend as much time on it; one memorable piece was a comic strip I made about my school friends.

제안: Your answer is personal and descriptive, but it repeats the same idea several times (e.g., "I've loved reading since I was a kid"). Reduce repetition, correct tense and article use, and use linking phrases ("because", "for example") to make reasons smoother. Add a brief specific example of a book or series to demonstrate engagement.

예시: I've been an avid reader since childhood; my mother introduced me to books early on. Because I enjoy imaginative worlds, I mainly read fantasy and some nonfiction—for example, I loved the Harry Potter series for its immersive storytelling.

제안: The response answers directly but has grammatical errors and an unclear phrase (“chicken fights”). Improve accuracy of vocabulary and grammar (use correct verb forms, articles, and clearer expressions). Use linking words to compare (e.g., "however", "on the other hand") and provide one brief example to clarify differences. Avoid informal or confusing expressions.

예시: No, I don't share hobbies with my family. For instance, my dad enjoys playing tennis and other sports, whereas my mother prefers relaxing at home and watching TV shows. On the other hand, my sister likes drawing, so our interests are quite different.

× I have a lot of hobbies, most of which are creative based.

✓ I have a lot of hobbies, most of which are creatively based.

The phrase 'creative based' uses an adjective where an adverb is required to modify 'based'. Use the adverb 'creatively' before 'based' to indicate how the hobbies are based. Alternatively, use the adjective form with a different structure: 'most of which are creative.'

× One of my favorite hobbies is to read books.

✓ One of my favorite hobbies is reading books.

When describing hobbies, English commonly uses the gerund (verb + -ing) after 'is' to name the activity: 'is reading,' not the full infinitive 'to read.' Change to the gerund for natural grammar and style.

× I prefer fantasy and nonfiction.

✓ I prefer fantasy and nonfiction books.

The sentence is grammatically acceptable, but adding 'books' clarifies the object and matches the context. This avoids ambiguity about what 'fantasy and nonfiction' refers to.

× I also love to cook and bake, mostly savory items.

✓ I also love to cook and bake, mostly savory dishes.

'Items' is grammatically possible but awkward; 'dishes' is a more natural collocation with 'savory' when talking about cooking. This is a word choice/quantifier improvement for clarity.

× When I was a child, I loved drawing.

✓ When I was a child, I loved drawing.

This sentence is correct. It uses past tense appropriately to describe a past habit, so no change is needed.

× I based my drawings from the media that I consumed, so a lot of them were inspired by anime and comics.

✓ I based my drawings on the media that I consumed, so a lot of them were inspired by anime and comics.

The correct preposition with 'based' is 'on' not 'from.' Use 'based on' to indicate source or inspiration. The rest of the sentence is correct.

× To this day, I still love to doodle now and then.

✓ To this day, I still love to doodle now and then.

The sentence is correct but slightly redundant: 'To this day' and 'still' or 'now and then' overlap. For conciseness, you could say 'I still love to doodle now and then' or 'To this day, I love to doodle.' This is a style suggestion rather than a strict grammar correction.

× However, I don't really delve into it as much as I did as a child.

✓ However, I don't really delve into it as much as I did when I was a child.

Adding 'when I was' clarifies the time reference. The comparative structure 'as much as I did' is correct, but specifying 'when I was a child' improves clarity and parallelism.

× The one hobby that I've had since I was a child is reading.

✓ The one hobby that I've had since I was a child is reading.

Sentence is correct; the article 'The' and tense usage are appropriate. No change needed.

× My mom introduced me to to the hobby and I've always loved the feeling of immersiveness that it brought me, the way that my imagination flared up whenever I read.

✓ My mom introduced me to the hobby, and I've always loved the immersive feeling it gave me, the way my imagination flared up whenever I read.

There is a duplicated 'to to' — remove the extra 'to'. 'Immersiveness' is a noun but 'immersive' as an adjective with 'feeling' is more natural. Use 'gave me' instead of 'brought me' for smoother phrasing. Also add a comma before 'and' to separate clauses.

× I preferred fantasy and nonfiction books because I feel like it brought me to a different world.

✓ I preferred fantasy and nonfiction books because I felt like they brought me to a different world.

Maintain past tense throughout when referring to past feelings: 'preferred' pairs with 'felt' and 'brought.' Also match plural 'books' with 'they' rather than singular 'it.' This fixes tense consistency and pronoun agreement.

× I don't have the same hobbies as my family members.

✓ I don't have the same hobbies as my family members.

Sentence is grammatically correct; no change needed.

× My dad is kind of sporty so his hobbies include playing tennis or enjoying a chicken fights while my mom prefers relaxing so she likes watching TV shows and movies.

✓ My dad is kind of sporty, so his hobbies include playing tennis and enjoying chicken fights, while my mom prefers relaxing, so she likes watching TV shows and movies.

Grammar issues: add commas to separate clauses. Use 'and' rather than 'or' to list hobbies. Remove the article before 'chicken fights' and make it plural to match general hobby description. This fixes conjunction use and punctuation.

× My sister on the other hand loves to draw so I don't really share hobbies with them.

✓ My sister, on the other hand, loves to draw, so I don't really share hobbies with her.

Add commas around the parenthetical 'on the other hand.' Use singular pronoun 'her' to refer to 'my sister' (pronoun agreement). Also add a comma before 'so' to join clauses. This corrects pronoun use and punctuation.