Hobby— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 回答要更自然、语法正确并且更简洁。开头直接给主题句，例如“I enjoy singing.” 然后用1–2句具体理由并用连接词。注意动词形式和时态（sing, singing, make me → makes me）。避免重复表达“think I'm like a superstar”太多次。

예시: I enjoy singing because it helps me relax and boosts my confidence. When I perform, I sometimes feel like a superstar, which lifts my mood and reduces stress.

제안: 回答要更流畅并修正语法错误。直接说“I used to draw in my books as a child” 并给出具体细节说明为什么以及如何受到姐姐影响。用连词连接句子并避免填充词“uh”。

예시: Yes, I used to draw in my schoolbooks when I was a child because my older sister loved drawing. She often showed me how to sketch animals and cartoons, so I copied her style and practiced a lot.

제안: 回答应更自然且句子简洁。直接回答并说明持续时间和原因，使用正确的时态和固定搭配（have had, enjoy singing, make me more confident）。删除多余语气词并用连接词加强逻辑。

예시: Yes, I have been singing since childhood because it makes me feel confident. Over the years I have practiced regularly, which helped me improve my voice and self-esteem.

제안: 回答要具体并使用正确的表达。说明谁有相同爱好、共同做什么以及影响是如何发生的。避免重复和口头语，使用连接词如“because”或“so”。

예시: Yes, my mother and older sisters also enjoy singing, so we often sing together at family gatherings. Their encouragement inspired me to practice more and join a school choir.

× Yes, my hobby is sing song because I like my voice.

✓ Yes, my hobby is singing because I like my voice.

该句中“sing song”用法不正确。表示“爱好是唱歌”时，hobby 后面应使用动名词（verb + -ing）作表语或补语，且无需重复单词“song”。建议使用“singing”或“sing”加名词“singing songs”。

× When I sing some I think I'm like a superstar.

✓ When I sing, I think I’m like a superstar.

原句中“sing some”不符合英语习惯，且缺少逗号来分隔从句。应使用动词原形“sing”表达习惯性动作，并在从句后接主句。改为“When I sing, I think I’m like a superstar.”。

× I can be relaxed and made me emotionally better.

✓ I can relax and it makes me feel emotionally better.

原句混合了情态动词与过去式“made”以及不正确的代词用法。表达“我可以放松，并且这使我情绪变好”时，应用不定式或动词原形“relax”与一般现在时“It makes me feel...”。因此改为“I can relax and it makes me feel emotionally better.”。

× Yes, when I was a child I used to draw picture at my books because uh, my Big Sisters, her really likes print picture and she influenced me.

✓ Yes, when I was a child I used to draw pictures in my books because my big sister really liked printed pictures and she influenced me.

句中问题包括复数、介词、代词和时态混用。“draw picture”应为“draw pictures”；“at my books”应为“in my books”；“Big Sisters, her really likes”存在代词多余和大小写问题，应为“my big sister really liked”；“print picture”应为“printed pictures”。使用过去常做的动作用“used to”与过去时一致。

× Yes, I have a hobby that I have since childhood, uh, because I very enjoy the experience that when I sing song, I think that will let me be more confident.

✓ Yes, I have had this hobby since childhood because I really enjoy the experience; when I sing, I feel more confident.

原句时态和词序混乱。表示从过去持续到现在应使用现在完成时“have had”；“very enjoy”不地道，应为“really enjoy”；“when I sing song”应为“when I sing”；“I think that will let me be more confident”意义不清且时态不匹配，改为“I feel more confident”更自然。

× Yes, I have the same hobby as my family members, uh, my mother and my Big Sisters, uh, like seeing some, uh, same with me.

✓ Yes, I have the same hobby as some of my family members; my mother and my big sister also like it.

原句代词和结构混乱。“my Big Sisters”大小写和单复数错误；“like seeing some, same with me”表达不清，需改为“also like it”或“also enjoy it”。另外可用“some of my family members”来表示部分家庭成员。

× Uh, I'm influenced by them.

✓ I'm influenced by them.

句子本身语法正确，但口语填充词“Uh”可去掉以更正式书面表达。保留句子时只需“I’m influenced by them.” 即可。