Hometown— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise, correct collocations and reduce fillers. Start with a clear topic sentence, use correct phrases (e.g., ‘historic landmarks’ and ‘picturesque scenery’), and limit to 2–3 supporting details linked with connectors like 'and' or 'also'.

예시: My hometown is a small city known for its historic landmarks and picturesque scenery. It also has a lively nightlife with many cafes and restaurants, which makes it attractive to both tourists and young people.

제안: Answer directly, avoid unclear words and fillers, and use specific vocabulary. Correct noun phrases (e.g., 'a local fish noodle dish' or the dish’s name), explain why you like it with one or two clear reasons, and avoid incorrect grammar like 'it was appeared'.

예시: What I like most is the local specialty, a fish noodle dish called X. It combines delicate fish broth with fresh herbs and springy noodles, so it tastes savory and comforting, which is why it's so popular.

제안: Good direct answer and personal detail. Make it more concise and avoid repetition (e.g., saying 'I have lived there for about 17 years' once). Use linking words briefly to connect reasons for attachment.

예시: I've lived there since I was born, so about 17 years. Because I grew up with my family and friends there, I have many memories and feel a strong sense of belonging.

제안: Avoid repeating vocabulary ('vibrant' twice) and be specific about opportunities. Provide one or two concrete examples (e.g., types of jobs, leisure activities) and link ideas with 'because' or 'for example'.

예시: Yes, I think it's a great place for young people because the growing economy offers jobs in retail and hospitality, and there are many leisure options such as gaming centers, cafes, and music events.

× My hometown is a small city famous for its, uh, historical landmark and practicing scenery.

✓ My hometown is a small city famous for its historical landmarks and picturesque scenery.

The sentence uses incorrect adjectives/nouns: 'historical landmark' should be plural 'historical landmarks' to match general description, and 'practicing scenery' is incorrect — likely intended 'picturesque scenery'. Use adjectives correctly to modify nouns; 'picturesque' is the correct adjective for attractive scenery.

× It also has a vibrant nightlife with many gaming centers, restaurants or cafes, which make it become more attractive to.

✓ It also has a vibrant nightlife with many gaming centers, restaurants, and cafes, which makes it more attractive.

Problems: incorrect conjunction 'or' should be 'and' in a list; 'which make it become' has subject-verb disagreement and extra verbs — use singular verb 'makes' to agree with 'a vibrant nightlife'; 'more attractive to' is incomplete — remove 'to'. Simplify structure to 'which makes it more attractive.' Use parallel list items and correct verb agreement.

× What I like most about my hometown is the local cuisine, especially a discolored fish noodles.

✓ What I like most about my hometown is the local cuisine, especially a dish of 'discolored' fish noodles.

Original mixes article and plural incorrectly: 'a discolored fish noodles' conflicts (a + plural). Either 'a discolored fish noodle' or 'fish noodles' — better: 'a dish of ... fish noodles'. Also 'discolored' may be the wrong adjective but preserved here; place adjectives before nouns and use correct article/quantity.

× Yes, it is a excellent mixture between flavors, umm, noodles and fresh ingredients.

✓ Yes, it is an excellent mixture of flavors, noodles, and fresh ingredients.

Article error: use 'an' before a vowel sound ('an excellent'). Preposition: use 'mixture of' not 'mixture between'. Also use commas and parallel list with 'and'.

× That is the main reason why it was appeared.

✓ That is the main reason why it appeared.

The verb phrase 'was appeared' is incorrect because 'appear' is intransitive and does not take a passive form here. Use active simple past 'appeared' if referring to something that happened, or present 'appears' depending on context. Here 'appeared' fits the past explanation.

× I have lived there since I was born.

✓ I have lived there since I was born.

This sentence is correct. Present perfect 'have lived' with 'since' is appropriate to describe continuous residence from birth to now. No change needed.

× I'm 17 now, so I have lived there for about 17 years because I grew up with my family and my friends, so I have many memories out there and I feel a strong sense of belonging to my hometown.

✓ I'm 17 now, so I have lived there for about 17 years. I grew up with my family and friends, so I have many memories there and feel a strong sense of belonging to my hometown.

Run-on sentence with repeated 'so' and awkward 'out there'. Split into two sentences for clarity. Use 'there' instead of 'out there' and omit redundant 'my' before 'friends'. Maintain tense consistency: 'have lived' and 'grew up' are fine together.

× Of course, I believe my hometown is an excellent place for young people to live.

✓ Of course, I believe my hometown is an excellent place for young people to live.

Sentence is correct. No article or grammar changes needed.

× Although it's a small city, it's very vibrant with many employment opportunities thanks to booming economy, and it also has a vibrant nightlife.

✓ Although it's a small city, it's very vibrant with many employment opportunities thanks to the booming economy, and it also has a lively nightlife.

Missing definite article before 'booming economy' — use 'the booming economy'. Repetition of 'vibrant nightlife' earlier is stylistic; change second 'vibrant' to 'lively' to avoid repetition. Ensure articles precede specific nouns.