Shopping— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific detail about where or why you shop. Avoid listing too many items and reduce fillers.

例: Yes, I enjoy shopping, especially for electronic gadgets. For example, I often browse malls for the latest mobile phones and headphones because I like trying new tech before buying.

提案: Organize your answer with a clear reason and one specific example; avoid hesitation and grammar mistakes. Use linking words like 'because' and 'so' to connect ideas and speak in present simple.

例: Yes, I always compare prices because I want to get the best value. For instance, I check both local and branded shops online, and if a local store offers the same features for less, I buy from there.

提案: Give a concise topic sentence and one clear contrasting example using linking words (e.g., 'however' or 'but'). Correct tense and reduce pauses to sound more fluent.

例: It depends. If I'm buying gadgets, it's easy because I know what features I want; however, choosing clothes or sunglasses is harder because I have to consider style and fit.

提案: State your opinion clearly and support it with a specific reason or example. Remove hesitations and awkward phrasing; use linking words like 'for example' or 'because' for coherence.

例: No, I don't think so because price doesn't always reflect quality. For example, I once bought a local-brand phone that performed as well as a more expensive model but cost much less.

× And I usually buy those things from shopping mall.

✓ And I usually buy those things from the shopping mall.

Missing definite article 'the' before 'shopping mall' is an article error; use 'the' when referring to a specific or general place where shopping occurs in this context. Suggestion: include 'the' before singular countable nouns when speaking about a known/place class (the shopping mall).

× I compare prices from the local shop and the branded shop and I uh get the things that I have been purchased.

✓ I compare prices at the local shop and the branded shop and I get the things that I have purchased.

Preposition 'from' is less natural here; use 'at' to indicate where you compare prices. 'Have been purchased' incorrectly uses passive present perfect; the intended meaning is active present perfect 'have purchased' or simple past 'purchased'. Remove extra 'been'. Suggestion: use 'compare prices at...' and 'have purchased' for correct tense and voice.

× It must be worth it, so I have to compare price and uh, then I decide uh what uh, which products should I buy?

✓ It must be worth it, so I have to compare prices and then I decide which products I should buy.

Errors: 'compare price' should be plural 'compare prices' (quantifier/number); question word order 'which products should I buy?' incorrectly used in embedded statement—embedded questions use statement order 'I should buy'. Also remove filler words. Suggestion: use plural 'prices' and subject-verb order for embedded questions: 'I decide which products I should buy.'

× It depends if uh, the items I need to buy uh, like a mobile phones or gadgets, then, uh, it was, it is not difficult for me, but if the things are close, sunglass T-shirts and then uh, the decision would be more difficult for me.

✓ It depends. If the items I need to buy are mobile phones or gadgets, then it is not difficult for me, but if the things are clothes, sunglasses, or T-shirts, then the decision would be more difficult for me.

Multiple plural/singular errors: 'a mobile phones' mixes singular article 'a' with plural 'phones'; use 'are mobile phones' and plural nouns 'sunglasses' and 'T-shirts' (not 'sunglass T-shirts'). Verb agreement: 'the items ... are' required. Also 'it was, it is' inconsistent tense; use 'it is'. Suggestion: ensure nouns and articles agree and use correct plural forms and clear list punctuation.

× Sometimes branded shops just, uh, hike their price and give the same value as compared to with the local shop.

✓ Sometimes branded shops just hike their prices and give the same value as the local shops.

Preposition phrase 'as compared to with' is incorrect and awkward. Use direct comparison 'as the local shops' or 'as local shops'. Also 'hike their price' should be plural 'prices' to match 'shops'. Suggestion: simplify comparisons: 'give the same value as local shops.'

× So, uh, the IT is the myth that expensive products are always better than cheap ones.

✓ So, the idea that expensive products are always better than cheap ones is a myth.

'the IT is the myth' misuses pronoun/article and word order. Better noun 'idea' or 'belief' and correct word order 'X is a myth.' 'The' before 'myth' is unnecessary when making generic statement. Suggestion: rephrase to 'the idea...is a myth' for clarity.