Shopping— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Чётче выражайте мысль, избегайте неверных слов и излишней пышности. Начните с простой темы, используйте не более 3 предложений и конкретные детали: опишите пример покупки или эмоцию. Избегайте неправильных словосочетаний («power brings», «fun outgoing»).

例: I enjoy shopping because I like trying on clothes and feeling different fabrics. For example, last weekend I bought a wool sweater after comparing its texture and warmth with two other options. I also enjoy shopping with friends because we give each other honest opinions.

提案: Упростите фразы и избегайте повторов. Дайте ясную тему и одно или два конкретных объяснения с примером. Уберите лишние вводные («Uh, frankly speaking») и исправьте грамматику («big price»).

例: Yes, I often compare prices because I want to get good value for money. For instance, when I bought a laptop I compared three stores online to find the best warranty and price before deciding.

提案: Сформулируйте ответ прямее: тема + причина + пример. Избегайте тавтологии («it is difficult» повторяется) и грамматических ошибок. Уточните, в чём именно сложность при выборе (размер, стиль, качество).

例: Sometimes I find it hard to choose because there are many styles and sizes available. For example, when buying a shirt online I hesitate between two sizes and worry about the fabric, so I read reviews and check size charts before buying.

提案: Дайте чёткую позицию и подкрепите её конкретным объяснением или примером. Избегайте грамматических ошибок («more better», «decorated to make their job more») и неопределённых фраз. Можно упомянуть качество, гарантию или бренд как аргументы и признать исключения.

例: I don't think expensive products are always better. Often pricier items have higher quality materials or longer warranties, for example a branded kitchen knife that stays sharp longer. However, some cheaper products work well too, so I compare reviews and materials before buying.

× There is something satisfying about feeling the texture of power brings or trying on clothes and accessories.

✓ There is something satisfying about feeling the texture of fabrics or trying on clothes and accessories.

The original sentence uses 'power brings', which is incorrect word choice and likely a typo for 'fabrics'. Use of the noun 'fabrics' fits the context of clothing textures. Also ensure the noun is countable/uncountable correctly. Suggestion: replace unclear/misspelled words with context-appropriate nouns and proofread for typos.

× What's more, it's a fun outgoing with friends or family gatherings where we can share opinions and enjoy each other's company.

✓ What's more, it's fun to go out with friends or attend family gatherings where we can share opinions and enjoy each other's company.

The phrase 'a fun outgoing' is incorrect; 'go out' or 'an outing' are appropriate. The corrected sentence uses the infinitive 'to go out' and the gerund 'attend' to make the structure natural. Suggestion: choose correct noun or verb forms ('outing' vs 'go out') and maintain parallel structure.

× Uh, frankly speaking, sometimes I compare prices when I shop because in my opinion, it's always better to consider the prices and the importance of this product before deciding to purchase on a big price something on a big price.

✓ Uh, frankly speaking, sometimes I compare prices when I shop because in my opinion it's always better to consider the price and the importance of a product before deciding to make a big purchase.

The original repeats phrases and uses incorrect word order ('on a big price something on a big price'). Use the singular 'price' when speaking generally and 'a product' as an indefinite noun. 'Make a big purchase' is the correct collocation. Suggestion: avoid repetition, use standard collocations, and simplify sentence structure.

× Frankly speaking, sometimes I feel uncertain because today the availability of global markets provides a wide variety of products, and sometimes it makes a difficult.

✓ Frankly speaking, sometimes I feel uncertain because the global market offers a wide variety of products, and sometimes that makes it difficult.

The phrase 'makes a difficult' is ungrammatical; use 'makes it difficult'. Also 'the availability of global markets provides' is wordy; 'the global market offers' is clearer. Suggestion: use dummy pronoun 'it' in expressions like 'makes it difficult' and simplify wordy phrases.

× It is difficult for me to choose right products, especially when I choose clothes.

✓ It is difficult for me to choose the right products, especially when I choose clothes.

Missing definite article 'the' before 'right products' is incorrect. 'Right products' should be 'the right products' to refer to specific suitable items. Suggestion: use 'the' when referring to a specific set of items and keep adjective order natural ('the right products').

× In my opinion, expensive products, sometime in various reasons are more better than cheaper ones because they are decorated to make their job more.

✓ In my opinion, expensive products, for various reasons, are often better than cheaper ones because they are designed to perform their function better.

Errors include 'sometime' (should be 'sometimes' or 'for various reasons'), 'more better' (double comparative; use 'better'), and awkward phrase 'decorated to make their job more'. 'Designed to perform their function better' is appropriate. Suggestion: avoid double comparatives, use correct adverb forms, and choose precise verbs like 'designed' rather than 'decorated'.