Gifts— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 답변이 의도를 잘 전달하고 있으나 문법 오류, 중복 표현, 연결어 부족으로 자연스러운 흐름이 깨집니다. 문장 구조를 간단한 주제문 + 한두 개의 구체적 세부사항으로 바꾸고 시제와 수일치를 바로잡으세요. 예: 주어·동사 일치(we/are satisfied), 불필요한 반복(‘I always’) 제거, ‘because’ 대신 ‘as’나 ‘so that’을 상황에 맞게 사용해 보세요. 또한 한 문장에 여러 생각을 넣기보다 2~3문장으로 나눠 더 명확히 표현하세요.

例: Yes, I am. I usually think about each person's personality and ask them what they need. By doing this, I can choose gifts that my friends actually want, so we are usually satisfied.

提案: 내용이 전달되지만 단어 선택과 문장 구성에 문제가 있습니다(‘author’, ‘Thursday’ 부적절). 구체적인 시간 표현(holidays, birthdays, special occasions)을 사용하고 중복 표현을 피하세요. 또한 연결어를 써서 이유나 빈도를 덧붙이면 더 자연스럽습니다. 예: ‘I usually give gifts on…’으로 시작하고 구체적 예시와 이유를 한 문장에 추가하세요.

例: I usually give gifts on special occasions like birthdays, holidays, or anniversaries. Often I choose food or wine because most of my friends enjoy those kinds of presents.

提案: 생각하는 기준을 잘 제시했지만 문장 흐름과 문법(중복, 어순)이 어색합니다. ‘practicality’ 같은 명사를 사용하고 이유와 방법을 논리적으로 연결하세요. 연결어(for example, therefore)를 사용해 구체적 사례를 덧붙이면 설득력도 높아집니다.

例: I mainly consider practicality when choosing a gift, because I want the recipient to actually use it. Therefore, I try to understand their current needs or interests—for example, choosing a kitchen gadget for someone who likes cooking.

提案: 열정이 느껴지지만 반복과 문법 오류가 많아 의사 전달이 흐려집니다. 과거 경험을 말할 때는 간결한 주제문 + 구체적 예시(what, when, who) + 결과(people's reactions)를 포함하세요. 중복 단어를 제거하고 동사의 시제를 맞추세요.

例: Yes, I have. I often make homemade cookies or cakes as special gifts for friends. They usually appreciate them and say my baking feels more personal than store-bought presents.

提案: 의견은 분명하지만 표현이 어색하고 반복·오타(‘billing’, ‘show my show my’)가 있습니다. 반대 의견을 제시할 때는 간단한 이유와 예시로 뒷받침하세요. 예: ‘No, I don't. I think thoughtfulness matters more than price, for example…’ 형태로 말하세요.

例: No, I don't think expensive gifts express feelings best. I believe thoughtfulness matters more—for instance, a handmade present or a thoughtful note often feels more meaningful than something costly.

× Yes I am because when I give gift to someone I always consider each person's personality and also ask for them to what they need so I and most of my friends are satisfied, were satisfied.

✓ Yes, I am, because when I give a gift to someone I always consider each person's personality and also ask them what they need, so most of my friends and I are satisfied.

문장에서 대명사 사용이 부적절합니다. 'ask for them to what they need'는 어색하며 목적어 자리에는 'ask them what they need'가 맞습니다. 또한 'I and most of my friends'의 자연스러운 순서는 'most of my friends and I'입니다. 'give gift' 앞에는 관사 a가 필요합니다. Suggestions: use 'a gift', use 'ask them what they need', and place 'most of my friends and I'.

× I usually give gifts to author to celebrate a special day such as holiday or Thursday, and I usually try to keep food or wine and many of them are interested in those kinds of gift.

✓ I usually give gifts to others to celebrate a special day such as a holiday or a birthday, and I usually choose food or wine because many people are interested in those kinds of gifts.

'author'는 문맥상 'others'여야 합니다. 'celebrate a special day such as holiday or Thursday'에서 'holiday' 앞에 관사 a가 필요하고 'Thursday'는 문맥에 맞지 않아 'birthday' 등으로 수정했습니다. 'try to keep food or wine'은 의미가 불분명하므로 'choose food or wine'로 변경했고 'many of them'보다 'many people'이 자연스럽습니다. 또한 'gift'는 복수형 'gifts'가 더 적절합니다. Suggestions: use correct prepositions/words like 'to others', add articles 'a holiday', and use appropriate nouns 'birthday'.

× I first I mainly consider the practical part because the purpose of giving gift is someone use those things useful. So I always try to understand their situation or needs or sometimes I think about their interest.

✓ First, I mainly consider the practical aspect because the purpose of giving a gift is for someone to use the item. So I always try to understand their situation or needs, and sometimes I think about their interests.

문장 구조가 어색합니다. 'I first I' 중복을 제거하고 'practical part'는 'practical aspect'로 바꾸는 것이 자연스럽습니다. 'the purpose of giving gift is someone use those things useful'는 문법적으로 틀리므로 'for someone to use the item'로 고쳐야 합니다. 'interest'는 복수형 'interests'가 더 적절합니다. Suggestions: remove repeated words, use 'for someone to + verb' 구조, and pluralize 'interests'.

× Of course I have I always give I I always want want to give special gift to others, so I made my own cookies or cake sometimes and many of my many of my friends are like my gift, so I.

✓ Of course I have. I always want to give special gifts to others, so I sometimes make my own cookies or cakes, and many of my friends like my gifts.

대명사와 단어 반복('I I', 'want want', 'many of my many of my')을 제거해야 합니다. 'give special gift'는 관사와 복수형이 필요하므로 'give special gifts'로 수정했습니다. 'made my own cookies or cake sometimes'는 시제와 어순을 고쳐 'sometimes make my own cookies or cakes'로 수정했습니다. 마지막 부분도 불완전 문장을 완성했습니다. Suggestions: remove repeated words, use plural forms for countable nouns when appropriate, and keep consistent tense.

× No I don't because some people might think expensive gift is better express their billing. However, I think the main important part is show my show my expression through the handmade things, so I usually made my made.

✓ No, I don't, because some people might think an expensive gift better expresses their feelings. However, I think the most important part is to show my feelings through handmade things, so I usually make them myself.

여기서는 대명사와 단어 반복('show my show my')이 문제이며 'billing'은 오용된 단어로 'feelings'로 바꿔야 합니다. 'expensive gift is better express'는 주어-동사 어순과 3인칭 단수 형태가 필요하므로 'an expensive gift better expresses'로 수정했습니다. 'usually made my made'는 문법적으로 틀리므로 'usually make them myself'로 고쳤습니다. Suggestions: correct word choice ('feelings'), use proper 3rd person singular verb form, remove repetitions, and use reflexive 'myself' when appropriate.