Watch— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct with a clear topic sentence, correct grammar, keep it concise (max 5 sentences), and add one specific reason with a linking word. Use correct verb forms and articles.

例: No, I don't usually wear a watch anymore because I use my phone to check the time. When I was in high school I did wear a watch to help schedule my study sessions, but now my phone is more convenient.

提案: Answer clearly (Yes/No), reduce hesitations, correct tense and prepositions, and organize details in 2–3 sentences with linking words like 'because' or 'so'.

例: Yes. When I was 17 my mother bought me an expensive watch after a trip to Chengdu because my father did not approve my buying it myself.

提案: Provide a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition and fillers, and support with 1–2 specific reasons using linking words like 'because' or 'for example'. Use precise vocabulary (e.g., 'status', 'wealth', 'style').

例: I think some people wear expensive watches because they want to show social status and wealth. For example, a luxury watch can signal income and personal style to others.

提案: Give a direct opinion sentence, then support it with one clear reason and a brief example. Eliminate fillers and grammatical errors; use linking words like 'because' or 'however'.

例: I don't think it's important to wear a watch because most people use phones to check the time. However, some people prefer watches for fashion or convenience during activities like sports.

× No, when I go to the university I no longer will watch because I can use my phones to check the time and in my high school I was wear a watch to check the time and schedule my study time.

✓ No, when I go to the university I no longer wear a watch because I can use my phone to check the time, and in high school I wore a watch to check the time and schedule my study.

Third person singular issue (ID 2) and subject-verb agreement (ID 27) appear: 'will watch' is incorrect for habitual present; 'I no longer will watch' should be 'I no longer wear a watch' to express a present habit. 'Phones' is plural but the speaker likely means 'phone' (singular) and 'I was wear a watch' is wrong: past habitual requires past tense 'wore' not 'was wear'. Suggestion: use simple present for current habits and simple past for past habits, and match verb forms to the subject.

× Maybe yes, because when I was 16 I even traveled to Chengdu and I found a very expensive watch. Uh, I really want to buy it, but my uh, dad didn't approve it, so my mother bought the watch for the gift for me in my 17th.

✓ Maybe yes, because when I was 16 I traveled to Chengdu and found a very expensive watch. I really wanted to buy it, but my dad didn't approve, so my mother bought the watch as a gift for me when I was 17.

Past tense issue (ID 5): maintain past tense consistency. 'I really want to buy it' should be 'I really wanted to buy it' to match the past context. 'bought the watch for the gift for me in my 17th' is ungrammatical: use 'as a gift for me when I was 17.' Suggestion: keep verbs in past tense for past events and use natural phrases like 'as a gift' and 'when I was 17.'

× In my opinion, it may be a symbol of social status and your economic, economic power. It can reflect your, uh, income and, uh, style and, uh, the sense of art feelings. So I think it's.

✓ In my opinion, it may be a symbol of social status and economic power. It can reflect your income, style, and sense of aesthetics. So I think so.

Incorrect use of adjectives or adverbs (ID 13) and sentence structure issues (ID 26): 'your economic, economic power' is repetitive and incorrect; 'the sense of art feelings' is awkward — use 'sense of aesthetics.' The sentence fragment 'So I think it's.' is incomplete; replace with 'So I think so.' Suggestion: avoid repetition, choose idiomatic nouns ('economic power', 'sense of aesthetics'), and complete sentence fragments.

× Not really, I think really. Oh, I think wearing a watch is a personal choice. Uh, it not necessary for me actually, because it's only, uh, has a function of checking the time and uh, we have so many events to check the time. So, uh, for me it's not, It's not.

✓ Not really. I think wearing a watch is a personal choice. It is not necessary for me, actually, because it only has the function of checking the time, and we have so many ways to check the time. So, for me, it's not necessary.

Sentence structure errors (ID 26) and article/errors with verb 'it not necessary' (ID 22/17): 'It not necessary' is missing the verb 'is' and articles are awkward. 'has a function of checking the time' is better as 'only has the function of checking the time' or 'only functions to check the time.' 'we have so many events to check the time' is unclear; likely 'ways' was intended. Suggestion: use complete clauses with subject and verb ('It is not necessary'), choose correct nouns ('ways' not 'events'), and avoid filler words.