Watch— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve clarity and accuracy: correct small mistakes (e.g. "adds a touch of elegance" not "adds our thoughts of elegance"), make the answer more concise (max 3–4 sentences), and use a clear topic sentence followed by one specific reason and a short example. Use linking words like "also" or "for example" to connect ideas.

例: Yes, I do. I often wear a watch when I go to college or formal events because it helps me keep track of time. Also, it adds a touch of elegance to my outfit; for example, I usually choose a simple leather watch for lectures and a metal one for interviews.

提案: Correct vocabulary errors and increase specificity: replace wrong words ("word" → "watch") and avoid redundancy ("particularly meaningful" and "completely unexpected" convey similar meaning). Add a brief detail about the watch (style, colour) or why it matters to make the answer more concrete. Keep to 2–3 sentences and use a linking word like "because" or "so".

例: Yes, my family gave me a watch for my birthday. It was a simple stainless-steel watch and I didn't expect it, so it felt very special; I still wear it sometimes because it reminds me of them.

提案: Good structure and content—clear topic sentence and supporting reasons. To improve further, vary vocabulary slightly (e.g. "symbol of status" or "social prestige") and add a short linking phrase to contrast motives ("however" or "additionally"). Keep answers concise (3–4 sentences) and include a brief example if possible.

例: There are a few reasons. For some, an expensive watch is a symbol of status and success, while others value the craftsmanship, precision and durability of luxury brands. For example, executives might wear one to make a professional impression at meetings.

提案: Fix word-choice and grammar errors ("words is" → "watches are"), make the topic sentence direct, and give one clear supporting reason with a concise example. Use linking words like "because" and "however" to structure contrast between general opinion and personal view.

例: I don't think it's essential nowadays because most people check time on their phones. However, I find watches practical because they are convenient in meetings or exams when using a phone would be inappropriate, so I still wear one occasionally.

× Apart from helping me keep track of time, I think it adds our thoughts of elegance to my overall appearance.

✓ Apart from helping me keep track of time, I think it adds an air of elegance to my overall appearance.

The phrase 'our thoughts of elegance' is incorrect and unnatural. The intended meaning is that the watch gives an impression of elegance; the correct idiom is 'an air of elegance'. Replace the incorrect phrase with 'an air of elegance' to convey the intended meaning clearly and grammatically.

× I was given a word by my family on my birthday and it was particularly meaningful to me because it was completely unexpected.

✓ I was given a watch by my family on my birthday and it was particularly meaningful to me because it was completely unexpected.

The original sentence uses 'word' instead of the intended noun 'watch', which is a lexical error rather than a grammar category, but it functions as an incorrect pronoun/noun choice here. Replacing 'word' with 'watch' corrects the meaning and maintains grammatical structure.

× I still wear it from time to time, so it has a quite a bit of sentimental value.

✓ I still wear it from time to time, so it has quite a bit of sentimental value.

The phrase 'a quite a bit of' is ungrammatical due to redundant articles. Use 'quite a bit of' or 'a bit of' but not both. The corrected sentence removes the extra 'a' to form the standard quantifier 'quite a bit of'.

× That said, I find words is quite practical, especially when I'm in a situation where using a phone would be inconvenient or inappropriate.

✓ That said, I find watches quite practical, especially when I'm in a situation where using a phone would be inconvenient or inappropriate.

The phrase 'I find words is quite practical' has multiple issues: 'words' is the wrong noun and 'is' is an incorrect verb form for a plural subject. Replacing 'words' with 'watches' and removing 'is' yields the correct plural-subject verb structure 'I find watches quite practical.' This fixes both lexical and subject-verb agreement errors.