Watch— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar; start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, and fix verb/preposition choices. Add one specific detail and use a linking word for coherence. For example, correct tense and phrasing, remove filler words, and limit to 2–4 sentences.

例: No, I don't wear a watch now. When I was a child I had a bright pink watch my uncle gave me, and I loved it because it made me feel confident and grown-up.

提案: Clarify and correct vocabulary and grammar (age expression, adjectives, and verb forms). Give a clear topic sentence, then one specific supporting detail and a linking word. Avoid unnecessary repetition about color and feelings.

例: Yes, I have. When I turned seven my favorite uncle gave me a bright pink watch with rainbow details, and I wore it every day because it helped me learn to tell the time.

提案: Organize the answer with a clear topic sentence and two concise reasons using linking words (for example, 'because' and 'also'). Correct grammar (plural/singular, articles) and choose precise vocabulary ('durable', 'status symbol').

例: People buy expensive watches mainly because they are status symbols and show prestige. Also, expensive watches tend to be more durable and use higher-quality materials, so they last longer.

提案: Give a clear, grammatical topic sentence and then one or two supporting points with correct linking words. Fix major errors ('people wore watches', 'people already have smartphones', 'watch as an accessory') and be specific about reasons (convenience, multifunctionality).

例: No, I don't think it's necessary today because most people use smartphones to check the time. Furthermore, phones offer many functions, so watches are now mainly worn as fashion accessories rather than essential tools.

× No, I don't. But when I was a child I used to wear a watch.

✓ No, I don't. But when I was a child I used to wear a watch.

No correction needed for tense: 'used to' correctly expresses a past habitual action. Keep as is.

× I received it from my uncle and it was a bright pink watch for children and I really loved it.

✓ I received it from my uncle; it was a bright pink children's watch and I really loved it.

Use the possessive form 'children's' to describe something made for children. Also a semicolon or split sentence improves clarity. Suggestion: use 'children's watch' for correct noun modification.

× I felt confident on it and also I was like like it's.

✓ I felt confident wearing it and I really liked it.

Original is ungrammatical and contains repetition 'like like' and unclear phrase 'I was like like it's.' Use 'felt confident wearing it' to show cause and 'I really liked it' to express preference. This fixes sentence structure and word choice.

× Yes I have. When I was a child I was turning the Sev 7 and my favorite uncle gave me a spruce present, a watch which was a bright pink rainbow colors and I really love it.

✓ Yes, I have. When I was a child I turned seven and my favorite uncle gave me a special present: a bright pink, rainbow-colored watch, and I really loved it.

Use simple past 'turned' for age reference. Spell out number 'seven' in speech is acceptable; correct 'Sev 7' to 'seven.' 'Spruce present' is incorrect word choice—use 'special.' Use past tense 'loved' to match past time frame. Use adjective form 'rainbow-colored.'

× I felt confident in it and I used to wear that for practical reasons.

✓ I felt confident wearing it and I used to wear it for practical reasons.

Use 'wearing it' or 'felt confident in it' consistently; 'used to wear that' should be 'used to wear it.' Keep past habitual 'used to' and past feeling 'felt.'

× I think some people like to wear and buy expensive watch because they are symbols of prestige and the status, while others prefer to wear them were expensive ones because it mainly lasts long and their material is stronger than cheaper ones.

✓ I think some people like to wear and buy expensive watches because they are symbols of prestige and status, while others prefer expensive ones because they last longer and their materials are stronger than cheaper watches.

Use plural 'watches' after 'buy.' Remove unnecessary definite article before 'status.' 'Were' is incorrect — should be omitted. Use comparative 'last longer' and plural agreement 'materials are stronger' and 'cheaper watches' for clarity and agreement.

× No, I'm convinced that it's not necessary to wear a watch nowadays.

✓ No, I'm convinced that it's not necessary to wear a watch nowadays.

Sentence is correct in present tense and needs no change.

× In the past, people were a watch because it referred as a symbol of prestige and the status.

✓ In the past, people wore watches because they were seen as symbols of prestige and status.

Use simple past 'wore' not 'were a watch.' 'Referred as' is incorrect; use 'were seen as' or 'were regarded as.' Remove article before 'status.' Ensure plural agreement 'watches' and 'symbols.'

× But nobody's pupil already have a smartphone to take the time and the they use watch as a accessor.

✓ But nowadays most people already have a smartphone to check the time, and they use watches as accessories less often.

'nobody's pupil' is incorrect; intended meaning is 'most people' or 'many people.' Use present perfect/ simple present 'have' for possession. 'Take the time' should be 'check the time.' 'Use watch as a accessor' should be plural 'watches as accessories.' Rephrase for natural, grammatical English.