Watch— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g. “Yes, I wear a watch.”). Avoid grammatical errors (“I will watch” → “I wear a watch”) and unclear phrases (“analogy watches”). Use one supporting detail and a linking phrase. Keep it under 4–5 sentences.

例: Yes, I wear a watch. I usually wear a Casio because it is reliable and keeps accurate time. In addition, it’s durable and suits my casual style, so I wear it most days.

提案: Answer clearly and reduce hesitations. Use past tense correctly (“Did you ever get” → “Yes, I received a watch from my father a few months ago”). Combine related details with linking words (e.g. “and”, “so”, “because”). Mention one specific detail about the gift to add authenticity.

例: Yes, I received a Casio watch from my father for my birthday a few months ago. It was actually the watch I had wanted for a long time, and I wear it on casual days because it’s accurate and durable.

提案: Be specific and use clearer reasoning with linking words. Start with a topic sentence, then give two brief reasons with examples. Avoid vague phrases like “that because for”.

例: People wear expensive watches for different reasons. For example, some wear them to show status or success, while others buy them because they trust the quality and craftsmanship of luxury brands.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and precise supporting details. Use correct verb forms and linking words (“because”, “so”) and avoid repetition. Provide one concrete example of when it’s useful.

例: Yes, I think it’s important to wear a watch, especially for students. For example, during exams I use my watch to keep track of how much time is left so I can pace myself and finish on time.

× Yes, I will watch.

✓ Yes, I wear a watch.

The student used 'will' (future) incorrectly when asked a habitual question in the present. Use simple present for habits and routines. Suggestion: use 'I wear a watch' to indicate regular action.

× It is more reliable and accurate as compared to other analogy watches.

✓ It is more reliable and accurate compared to other analog watches.

The phrase 'as compared to' is wordy and nonstandard here; 'analogy' is incorrect word choice for 'analog' (referring to non-digital watches). Use 'compared to' and the adjective 'analog'. Suggestion: say 'compared to other analog watches' or 'than other analog watches.'

× Have you ever got a watch as a gift?

✓ Have you ever gotten a watch as a gift?

In present perfect questions in many dialects (especially American English), 'gotten' is the past participle of 'get.' If using British English, 'Have you ever got a watch as a gift?' can be acceptable; however, to match standard present perfect usage in American English, use 'gotten.' Suggestion: choose 'gotten' for American English or keep 'got' for British English but be consistent.

× Yes, a few months ago I got a gift, uh, as a watch from my father.

✓ A few months ago I received a watch as a gift from my father.

The original has awkward word order and unnecessary filler 'a gift, uh, as a watch.' Use 'received a watch as a gift from my father' to produce clear, natural word order. 'Received' or 'got' is acceptable; 'received' is slightly more formal.

× Uh, the watch was Casio, so it was my dream watch to buy and my father gave it on my birthday.

✓ The watch was a Casio, so it was the watch I had wanted to buy, and my father gave it to me on my birthday.

Missing article before 'Casio' and awkward phrasing 'dream watch to buy.' Also 'gave it on my birthday' lacks the indirect object. Use 'a Casio,' rephrase to 'the watch I had wanted to buy' and 'gave it to me on my birthday.' Suggestion: include articles and use natural relative clause order.

× It is an accurate and reliable watch which I do wear on casual days.

✓ It is an accurate and reliable watch which I wear on casual days.

The auxiliary 'do' is unnecessary in affirmative simple present declarative sentences. Use 'I wear' for habitual action. Suggestion: remove 'do' unless used for emphasis.

× Everyone has their own reasons, so I think that people wear that because for their high status and reliability.

✓ Everyone has their own reasons, so I think people wear them because of status and to show reliability.

Problems: pronoun 'that' is incorrect referring to watches; 'their high status' is unclear and 'because for' is ungrammatical. Use 'them' to refer to watches, 'because of status' and parallel infinitive 'to show reliability.' Suggestion: use clear pronouns and correct prepositional phrase 'because of.'

× Yes I do. It is important to wear a watch as I'm a student so I always wanted to have to monitor my time whenever I'm in the exam hall to get to know how much time is left for me.

✓ Yes, I do. It is important to wear a watch because I am a student, so I always want to monitor my time in the exam hall to know how much time I have left.

Tense and modal issues: 'I'm a student so I always wanted' mixes present and past; 'have to monitor' is redundant with 'want to.' Use present simple 'want' for habitual desire. 'To get to know how much time is left for me' is wordy; use 'to know how much time I have left.' Suggestion: keep present tense consistent and simplify infinitive phrases.