Dreams— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Shorten and clarify your response. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid repetitive phrases (e.g., "remember/recall", "had dreamed"). Use linking words like "because" or "so" to connect ideas.

例: Yes, I usually remember my dreams. For example, I often recall dreams about my future career, and I think they help me stay focused because they remind me of my goals.

提案: Be concise and avoid unclear phrases and names. Give one clear reason for sharing dreams and one brief example. Use linking words like "because" or "and" correctly.

例: Yes, I often share my dreams with close friends because they support my goals. For example, I told a friend about wanting to study law in the US, and she gave me useful advice about universities and scholarships.

提案: Make your opinion clear and give a specific reason or example. Avoid vague statements and incorrect grammar. Use a linking word like "because" or "so" to connect your view and the reason.

例: Yes, I believe some dreams can have special meaning because they often reflect our worries or ambitions. For instance, dreaming about an exam might show that you are anxious about performance and should prepare more.

提案: Answer directly and give a specific plan or step you will take. Keep sentences natural and avoid awkward phrases like "prove my dreams to true." Use connecting words such as "so" or "therefore."

例: Yes, I want to make my dreams come true. For example, I plan to apply to law schools in the US after finishing my degree and study hard for the entrance exams so I can qualify for admission and scholarships.

× I have the power to remember or recall all the dreams that I had dreamed and sometimes I also prefer to remind all the dreams that I had as it helped me to remind my particular aim in my life.

✓ I can remember or recall all the dreams I have had, and sometimes I also try to recall them because they help me remember my life goals.

Using 'had dreamed' and 'had' is unnecessary; present perfect 'have had' is appropriate to express past experiences relevant now. 'Have the power to remember' is wordy; 'can remember' is natural. 'Prefer to remind all the dreams' is incorrect collocation; use 'try to recall them' or 'recall them'. Also adjust tenses for consistency and clarity.

× I prefer to share my own dreams with my friends as it helps me to share my experiences as well as my future goals with my Keith and Kings.

✓ I prefer to share my dreams with my friends because it helps me share my experiences and my future goals with them.

'My Keith and Kings' is unclear and likely incorrect; replace with the pronoun 'them' to refer to friends. 'As' can be used but 'because' is clearer for reason. Avoid repeating 'my' unnecessarily.

× And also I am interested in the other stream as the others thought about their particular task. Help me to know about the various exposures of life.

✓ I am also interested in other people's perspectives and what they think about their specific tasks because this helps me learn about different aspects of life.

Original sentences are fragmented and ungrammatical. 'Other stream' and 'various exposures' are awkward. Rephrase to 'other people's perspectives' and combine into a single coherent sentence. Use 'helps me learn' for clarity.

× I think that dreams have special meaning as whenever we went to sleep then some particular dreams or special dreams arise in our sleeping hours and data helps us to indicate towards our long term goal that help us to solve our problems and do hard work.

✓ I think dreams have special meaning because when we go to sleep certain dreams arise, and they can indicate our long-term goals, helping us solve problems and work hard.

Mix of past and present ('went' with general statement) is incorrect; use present simple 'go' for habitual actions. 'Data helps us to indicate towards' is incorrect; use 'they can indicate'. Use 'long-term' as adjective and 'helping us' for parallel structure.

× I want to improve my dreams and also to prove them in the real life as I have dreamed about to become a lawyer in US after completing my further education and I will prove my dreams to true as it is the real time happening.

✓ I want to make my dreams come true in real life. I have dreamed of becoming a lawyer in the US after completing my further education, and I will make that dream a reality.

'Improve my dreams' and 'prove them in the real life' are incorrect collocations; use 'make my dreams come true' and 'make that dream a reality'. Use 'dreamed of becoming' not 'dreamed about to become'. 'Prove my dreams to true' is ungrammatical.