Dreams— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your answer more concise and add a linking word to explain frequency and reason. Keep to 2–3 sentences and use slightly more precise vocabulary (e.g., “recall” instead of “remember”).

例: Yes, I can often recall my dreams when they are vivid or emotionally intense. However, I usually forget them within a few hours, so only the most striking ones stay with me.

提案: Start with a direct topic sentence, then briefly explain why and use a linking word for coherence. Correct minor grammar (subject-verb agreement) and replace informal phrase “small talk” with “talking about dreams.”

例: Yes, I often share my dreams with friends and sometimes my boyfriend. Because talking about dreams feels intimate, it helps us bond and understand each other better.

提案: Organize into a clear topic sentence and one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid filler phrases and fix tense/grammar (e.g., “we don’t always know”). Provide a concrete example succinctly.

例: Yes, I believe many dreams can reflect our inner feelings or concerns. For example, when I feel depressed, my dreams often become strange and emotionally intense, which can give me clues about underlying issues.

提案: Answer directly, then contrast with a linked reason. Remove hesitation words like “umm” and replace informal “sweet dreams” with clearer phrasing. Keep within 2–3 sentences.

例: It depends on the dream: if it’s a positive dream about my goals or relationships, I would like it to come true. However, if it’s a recurring nightmare, I certainly would not want that to happen.

× However, I forgot them within a few hours.

✓ However, I forget them within a few hours.

The student used past tense 'forgot' which conflicts with the prior present-tense statement 'I sometimes remember.' To describe a habitual action use the simple present 'forget.' Suggestion: use simple present for repeated or habitual actions (I forget them within a few hours).

× I feel like having small talk with them make us even closer.

✓ I feel like having small talk with them makes us even closer.

The verb should agree with the singular subject 'having small talk' (gerund phrase considered singular), so use 'makes' not 'make.' Suggestion: match verb number to the subject (having small talk ... makes).

× Sometimes we just didn't know about that.

✓ Sometimes we just don't know about that.

The sentence refers to a general or habitual lack of knowledge, so simple present 'don't know' is appropriate rather than past 'didn't know.' Use present tense for general truths or habitual states. Suggestion: use 'don't' for present habitual meaning.

× For example, when I feel very depressed, normally my dreams, of course they're strange or a bit weird, but also they give me a clue to find out what caused the sadness.

✓ For example, when I feel very depressed, my dreams are often strange or a bit weird, but they also give me clues to help me find out what caused the sadness.

Original sentence has disfluent inserted phrase 'of course they're' breaking sentence flow and singular/plural mismatch ('a clue' vs 'give'). Use clear structure: 'my dreams are often... but they also give me clues to help me find out...' Also changed 'a clue' to plural 'clues' or keep singular but adjust verb. Suggestion: remove interrupting phrases, keep subject-verb agreement, and use plural 'clues' or rephrase 'give me a clue' with singular subject.

× If there are sweet dreams, of course I want them to be true.

✓ If I have sweet dreams, of course I want them to come true.

The conditional 'If there are sweet dreams' is awkward; use 'If I have sweet dreams.' Also 'want them to be true' is less natural than 'want them to come true.' Suggestion: use 'have' for personal dreams and the idiom 'come true.'

× However, umm, sometimes I find myself trapped in my nightmares over and over again.

✓ However, sometimes I find myself trapped in nightmares over and over again.

The sentence is mostly correct but 'my nightmares' is acceptable; removed filler 'umm' and 'my' to sound more natural and concise. Tense (present simple 'find') matches habitual experience. Suggestion: omit fillers and unnecessary possessive for clarity.