Internet— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains many errors in grammar and word choice. Aim to give a clear topic sentence, then 1–2 supporting details, using correct verb forms and simple vocabulary. Keep it to 2–4 short sentences and use linking words (for example, "because" or "so"). Be specific about when you started and what you used the internet for.

例: I started using the internet when I was in middle school, about 12 years old. At that time I mainly used it for simple research for school projects and to play online games, which felt exciting and new.

提案: Your idea is good but sentences are fragmented and contain odd word choices. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific examples using linking words like "for example" or "so". Check sentence structure and avoid redundant phrases.

例: I go online several times every hour because I carry my smartphone with me all the time. For example, I check work emails in the morning and scroll through social media during breaks, so the internet is an essential part of my daily routine.

提案: Your response has good content but is confused by grammar and vocabulary mistakes. Give a clear topic sentence (when and why), then one brief detail about how it felt. Use correct past tense and simpler words to avoid confusion.

例: Yes. During my high school finals my parents restricted my internet access so I could concentrate on studying. It was frustrating at first, but in the end it helped me focus and study more effectively.

提案: The idea is clear but vocabulary and spelling errors make it hard to follow. Use precise words (e.g., "short videos", "set boundaries", "productive activities") and one linking phrase like "so" or "therefore". Keep to two sentences: state your opinion then give a specific action you will take.

例: Yes, I often find myself mindlessly scrolling through short videos for hours. Therefore, I plan to set daily time limits on my apps and replace some screen time with reading or exercise.

提案: This answer is clear and relevant but has small grammar errors and could be slightly more specific. Use correct modal forms and plural/singular forms, and add one concrete example to make it more vivid. Keep it within 2–3 sentences.

例: If the internet disappeared, I would probably return to traditional hobbies like reading physical books and hiking outdoors. I would also meet friends more often in person, for example by joining a local book club.

× I first access the Wave when I was in middle school around the A Uptown in Italy.

✓ I first accessed the web when I was in middle school in Uptown, Italy.

The sentence has incorrect verb tense and awkward word choice/word order. 'Access' should be past tense 'accessed' because the time reference is 'when I was in middle school'. 'The Wave' is unclear; 'the web' or 'the Internet' is more appropriate. 'around the A Uptown' is ungrammatical; reorder to 'in Uptown, Italy'. Improve clarity and use correct past tense.

× Is your church for rudimentary tasks like research in school projects of lay and symbol online games which feel quite revolutionary at that time.

✓ It was mostly for basic tasks like researching for school projects and playing simple online games, which felt quite revolutionary at the time.

This sentence has multiple structure and word-choice errors. 'Is your church' is nonsensical in context; likely intended 'It was'. 'Rudimentary tasks' better as 'basic tasks'. Use gerunds and parallelism: 'researching for school projects and playing simple online games'. 'Lay and symbol' are incorrect words. Use past tense 'felt' to match 'at that time'.

× Practically every hour in this day and age, I'm virtually always connected through my smartphone.

✓ These days, I'm virtually always connected through my smartphone.

The original placement of adverbial phrases is awkward. Use 'These days' to indicate current habitual action. 'Practically every hour' is redundant with 'virtually always'; choose one. The correction keeps natural adverb placement and meaning.

× Where weather is for checking work emails or scrolling through social media.

✓ I use it to check work emails or scroll through social media.

This fragment lacks a subject and verb. Replace with a complete sentence: 'I use it to...' to state purpose. 'Where weather is' is incorrect and irrelevant.

× The Internet has become an in the same dispensable part of my daily routine.

✓ The Internet has become an indispensable part of my daily routine.

The phrase contains extraneous words ('in the same') and misspells 'indispensable' as 'dispensable'. Remove unnecessary words and correct spelling to convey intended meaning.

× Internet certainly during my high school finals, my parents restricted my access to the way to ensures I stay focused on my studies.

✓ During my high school finals, my parents certainly restricted my Internet access to ensure I stayed focused on my studies.

The original sentence has wrong word order, tense, and verb forms. Move the time expression to the start, use 'restricted my Internet access', and 'ensure' should be 'ensure I stayed' or 'to ensure I stayed' with past tense 'stayed' to match the time reference.

× It was a false digital detox.

✓ It felt like a fake digital detox.

'False' is not the best collocation here; 'fake' or 'like a false start' fits better. 'Felt like' expresses subjective experience more naturally.

× The desk was quite FRA frustrating but ultimately have me rated.

✓ It was quite frustrating, but ultimately it helped me concentrate.

This sentence has typos ('FRA'), incorrect verb forms ('have me rated'), and unclear subject ('the desk'). Replace with a coherent statement in past tense: 'It was quite frustrating, but ultimately it helped me concentrate.'

× To be honest, I often find myself mindlessly scrolling through soft videos for hours on end.

✓ To be honest, I often find myself mindlessly scrolling through short videos for hours on end.

'Soft videos' is a mistaken word; likely 'short videos'. The present tense 'find' is correct for habitual action. Correct the vocabulary to match intended meaning.

× I really need to set some botheries and reduce my screen screen time for to focus more on productive relay activity.

✓ I really need to set some boundaries and reduce my screen time to focus more on productive activities.

Multiple errors: 'botheries' should be 'boundaries'; doubled 'screen'; 'for to focus' is ungrammatical—use 'to focus'; 'productive relay activity' is incorrect—use 'productive activities'. Fix word choice and infinitive usage.

× If the Internet vanished, I likely revert to more traditional hobbies like reading physical books or spending more time outdoors.

✓ If the Internet vanished, I would likely revert to more traditional hobbies like reading physical books or spending more time outdoors.

Conditional sentence needs a modal in the result clause. With past simple in 'If the Internet vanished', use 'would' + base verb: 'would likely revert'. Add 'would' to form the second conditional.

× I'd definitely have to embrace a much slower pace of life and communicate more in persons.

✓ I'd definitely have to embrace a much slower pace of life and communicate more in person.

'In persons' is incorrect; the idiom is 'in person' (singular). Use the correct prepositional phrase. The rest of the sentence is fine with conditional 'I'd'.