Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is clear and directly addresses the question, but it contains a repetition (“when when”) and is very short. To improve, avoid repetition, use a natural topic sentence, and add one or two brief supporting details (reason or a short memory) using a linking word. Keep it under five sentences.

例: No, I didn’t have a bicycle when I was a child. However, I remember borrowing my friend’s bike often, so I learned to ride that way. As a result, I became comfortable cycling even without owning one.

提案: Your answer gives a relevant opinion but has grammatical errors and awkward phrasing (“If I think,” “short tips,” “community commuting”). Improve by starting with a clear topic sentence, using correct phrases (e.g., “short trips,” “commuting within the community”), and add a linking word to support your point with a specific reason or example. Keep it concise and natural.

例: Yes, I think bikes are quite popular in our city for short trips and local commuting because they are inexpensive and help avoid traffic. For example, many people cycle to nearby shops or stations, especially during rush hour.

× No, I didn't have a bicycle when when I was a child.

✓ No, I didn't have a bicycle when I was a child.

This sentence contains a repeated word 'when' (a typographical/repetition error) and the rest of the sentence correctly uses past simple tense ('didn't have') to refer to a past state. Remove the duplicated 'when' to correct the sentence. Suggestion: proofread for accidental repeated words and ensure only one 'when' remains. Grammar problem type ID:5

× If I think bikes are popular in our city for short tips and community commuting because they are cheap and they avoid traffic.

✓ I think bikes are popular in our city for short trips and for commuting within the community because they are cheap and help avoid traffic.

Multiple issues apply: the sentence incorrectly begins with 'If I think', which is an unnecessary conditional marker and creates a sentence fragment; this is a sentence structure error (use a plain statement 'I think'). The word 'tips' is a typo and should be 'trips' (vocabulary error). 'Community commuting' is awkward; 'commuting within the community' or simply 'commuting' is clearer. Also replace 'they avoid traffic' with 'help avoid traffic' to show bikes assist in avoiding traffic rather than directly avoiding it themselves. Suggestions: remove the leading 'If', correct 'tips' to 'trips', add 'for' before 'commuting' for parallel structure, and use 'help avoid traffic' for natural phrasing. Grammar problem type ID:26