Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your answer more natural and grammatically correct by using a clear topic sentence, fixing verb agreement, avoiding repetition, and adding one brief specific detail. Use a linking word to connect ideas (e.g., "because"). Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child. I wanted one, but my parents were worried about my safety because the roads near our home were busy. As a result, I usually walked or took the bus to school.

提案: Provide a clear topic sentence, avoid repeating the same phrase, and give a specific example or reason. Use linking words (e.g., "for example", "because") and vary vocabulary (e.g., "bicycle taxis", "motorbike taxis"). Keep to 2–3 sentences for clarity.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because they are cheap and convenient for short trips. For example, many people use motorbike taxis like Uber and local bike services as a quick way to commute and earn money.

× No, I didn't have a bike, but I wished I had a bike, but my parents was very scared of it, so I didn't have a bike.

✓ No, I didn't have a bike, and I wished I had one, but my parents were very scared of it, so I didn't get a bike.

Errors identified: incorrect verb agreement 'parents was' should be 'parents were' because 'parents' is plural (Subject-verb agreement, mapped to Past tense issue as the sentence uses past forms). Use of 'but' twice is stylistically repetitive; replace with 'and' for clarity. 'I wished I had a bike' is acceptable but 'I wished I had one' avoids repetition; 'so I didn't have a bike' is better expressed as 'so I didn't get a bike' to show causation. Suggestion: match plural subjects with plural past verbs (were), avoid repeating conjunctions, and use pronouns to prevent repetition.

× Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country. Even the Uber and Patha rides are very frequent in our country. It's a great source of income in our country.

✓ Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country. Even Uber and Pathao rides are very frequent here, and they are a great source of income.

Problems: repetitive phrase 'in our country' three times is wordy; streamline to 'in my country' or 'here'. 'The Uber and Patha rides' uses an unnecessary definite article and misspells 'Pathao' (if referring to the ride-hailing service); article use is incorrect (Article errors/Sentence structure). Combine sentences to improve flow and clarify that 'they' refers to bike rides as a source of income. Suggestion: avoid redundant phrases, use correct proper names and appropriate articles, and combine related ideas for cohesion.