Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two supporting details using linking words. Avoid hesitations and repetition. For example, say you didn’t have a bike and explain why (fear) and maybe mention if you later learned or still avoid cycling.

例: No, I didn’t have a bike as a child because I was afraid of falling. However, I became more confident in my teens and tried cycling a few times with friends.

提案: Organize your answer with a clear topic sentence and use linking words to add specific details. Reduce filler words and use accurate vocabulary (e.g., "interested in", "ride a bike", "in the morning"). Mention where and why people cycle to provide concrete examples.

例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country. For example, many people ride bikes for exercise and commuting, especially in the mornings in parks and on cycling paths, so I often see cyclists when I go out.

× No, uh, no. Uh, in my childhood I was afraid of a bike.

✓ No, I wasn't. When I was a child I was afraid of bikes.

The original sentence mixes informal hesitations and an awkward time phrase. Use past tense consistently: 'When I was a child' is the natural time expression and 'afraid of bikes' uses plural to refer generally to that category. Also replace repeated 'No, uh, no' with a single clear negative response for fluency.

× Uh, yes, in my country, uh, there are many people who uh, interesting about uh, a sport and doing exercise, uh, actually W in morning.

✓ Yes. In my country many people are interested in sports and do exercise, especially in the morning.

Several errors: 'interesting about' is wrong — the correct passive construction is 'are interested in' (state verb). 'a sport' should be plural 'sports' when speaking generally. 'doing exercise' should be 'do exercise' for habitual action. 'actually W' appears to be noise; replaced with 'especially'. Use 'in the morning' for time. The sentence now uses correct verb forms and quantifiers.

× So when I go around straight, I found many people who drive a bike.

✓ So when I go out for a walk, I find many people who ride bikes.

Tense and verb choice issues: 'when I go around straight' is unnatural; 'go out for a walk' fits the context. The original mixes past ('I found') with present habitual context; use present simple 'I find' for habitual observations. 'drive a bike' is incorrect collocation in English — use 'ride a bike' and plural 'bikes' for generality. The corrected sentence keeps present habitual tense and correct verb forms.