Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and consistent, correct grammar, avoid contradictions and redundancy, and give a short clear topic sentence followed by one or two specific supporting details. Use correct tense and pronouns and link your ideas (for example: however, but, because).

例: No, I didn't have a bicycle when I was a child. My parents didn't allow us to ride on the road because they thought it was unsafe, so I only rode a small tricycle under their supervision at home. However, I never learned to ride an adult bike properly.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, and add specific supporting details with linking words (for example: because, for instance, therefore). Use more precise vocabulary (e.g., 'motorbikes' or 'bicycles', 'commute' instead of 'daily means').

例: Yes, bicycles and motorbikes are very popular in my country because many people find them affordable and convenient. For instance, middle-class workers often commute by motorbike to work to avoid traffic and high public transport costs, so you'll see them used every day in cities and towns.

× I grew up in a household that really don't allow us to ride a bike.

✓ I grew up in a household that really didn't allow us to ride a bike.

The clause 'that really don't allow us' refers to 'household' (singular), so the verb must agree with a singular subject. Also the main clause is in the past (I grew up), so the reporting verb should be in past tense 'didn't allow' rather than present 'don't allow'. Use 'didn't allow' to match past context and ensure subject-verb agreement. Suggestion: Use 'didn't allow' when referring to a past restriction by a singular noun.

× So yeah, I had a cycle.

✓ So yeah, I didn't have a bicycle.

This sentence contradicts the previous denial of having a bike. The student likely intended to repeat that they did not have a bicycle. The original 'I had a cycle' is inconsistent and causes a meaning error. To match the question and prior denial, use 'I didn't have a bicycle.' Also 'bicycle' is more natural than 'cycle' in this context. Suggestion: Keep tense and meaning consistent across sentences; if denying possession in the past, use 'didn't have'.

× I used to ride it while I was a kid, but I and I don't even know how to ride a bike.

✓ I didn't ride one when I was a kid, and I still don't know how to ride a bike.

The original contains contradictions and repetition ('I used to ride it' vs earlier denial) and an ungrammatical phrase 'but I and I'. To be coherent with prior statements denying a bicycle in childhood, say 'I didn't ride one when I was a kid.' Also maintain tense consistency: 'I still don't know how to ride a bike' expresses current inability. Use 'one' to avoid repetition and fix sentence joining with 'and.' Suggestion: Check for logical consistency and remove repeated fragments; join clauses with appropriate conjunctions (and, but) and maintain tense.

× Yes, bikes are pretty popular in my country, like every single person almost used a bike.

✓ Yes, bikes are pretty popular in my country; almost every single person used a bike.

Word order and quantifier placement are incorrect. 'Every single person almost used a bike' is awkward; the correct order is 'almost every single person used a bike.' Also use a semicolon or separate sentence to link ideas. Maintain past tense 'used' only if referring to a past general habit; if referring to present general habit, use 'uses' (see suggestion). Suggestion: For present general habits say 'almost every single person uses a bike.' Place adverbs like 'almost' before quantifiers such as 'every'.

× And for the middle class people it is a daily means of transportation as they really can't afford the cars.

✓ And for middle-class people it is a daily means of transportation because they really can't afford cars.

Use of 'the' before 'middle class people' and 'the cars' is unnecessary and incorrect here. Hyphenate 'middle-class' when used as a compound adjective. Use 'because' rather than 'as' for clearer cause, though 'as' is possible. Remove the article before 'cars' when speaking generally. Maintain present tense 'is' and modal 'can't' for general truth. Suggestion: Say 'middle-class people' or 'the middle class' and avoid unnecessary definite articles when talking about things in general.

× It is their daily means of transportation and they ride it very much.

✓ It is their daily means of transportation and they ride them a lot.

'Ride it very much' is unnatural: 'bike' is plural in this context ('them') or use 'bicycles'/'bikes' and 'a lot' is more natural than 'very much' for frequency. Also ensure pronoun agrees in number with the noun it replaces. Use 'ride them a lot' or 'use them a lot.' Suggestion: Use plural pronoun 'them' for 'bikes' and prefer 'a lot' or 'frequently' to express frequency.