Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Focus on clarity, correct vocabulary, grammar, and concise structure. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct common word choices (e.g., "bicycle" not "buy"; "small, child-sized bike" not "rabbi scale"). Use past tense consistently and keep to no more than 3–4 sentences.

例: Yes, I had a bicycle when I was a child. My parents bought me a small, child-sized bike with training wheels, and I rode it every afternoon in the neighbourhood park. Because I practised daily, I gained confidence and better coordination, and those rides remain one of my fondest memories.

提案: Answer directly, use correct vocabulary (e.g., "bikes" instead of "skirts"), and give a clear reason with a specific example. Use linking words like "because" or "for example" and avoid repetitions. Keep sentences short and grammatical, and include one specific detail such as commuting or exercise.

例: Yes, bicycles are quite popular in my country because they are cheap and convenient for short trips. For example, many people cycle to local shops or take short commutes to work, especially in crowded city centres where traffic is a problem.

× Yes, I did have a buy one.

✓ Yes, I did buy one.

The original sentence uses an incorrect verb form 'have a buy'. When using the auxiliary 'did' for past simple questions or emphatic statements, the main verb should be in base form. Replace 'have a buy' with 'buy' to form 'did buy'. Also 'did have' could be acceptable in some contexts but collocationally 'did buy' is correct here.

× my parents found me a small rabbi scale with training wheels and I use it every afternoon to ride around the neighborhood park which tell me better confidence and coordination.

✓ My parents found me a small bicycle with training wheels and I used it every afternoon to ride around the neighborhood park, which gave me better confidence and coordination.

Multiple problems appear but limited to listed types: 'r abbi scale' is likely a misheard noun; corrected to 'bicycle' (singular noun). 'use' is wrong tense (past) handled separately below but main plural/singular issue addressed by choosing correct noun form. 'which tell me' uses wrong verb form and subject agreement; 'which gave me' matches singular 'park' and past time frame. Use 'bicycle' instead of nonsense phrase to make sentence grammatical and coherent.

× and I use it every afternoon to ride around the neighborhood park which tell me better confidence and coordination.

✓ and I used it every afternoon to ride around the neighborhood park, which gave me better confidence and coordination.

The context is about childhood (past), so verbs should be in past tense. 'use' should be 'used' and 'tell' should be 'gave' to reflect completed actions in the past. Also add a comma before 'which' to link the nonrestrictive clause.

× Riding that bike became one of my fondest memories because it gave me a sense of hidden and independence.

✓ Riding that bike became one of my fondest memories because it gave me a sense of freedom and independence.

'hidden' is incorrect in meaning and collocation here. The intended idea is likely 'freedom'. Replace 'hidden' with 'freedom' to convey a sense of autonomy. Also 'independence' pairs naturally with 'freedom'.

× Yes, my skirts are quite popular in my country.

✓ Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country.

The word 'skirts' is incorrect in context; the student likely meant 'bikes'. This is a wrong noun choice rather than a pure plural error, but correcting to the appropriate plural noun 'bikes' fixes meaning and number agreement with the context.

× Many people ride them because they are forever and the great way to keep it, especially for especially for short journey around town.

✓ Many people ride them because they are a convenient and great way to get around, especially for short journeys around town.

Several issues: 'forever' is the wrong word; use 'convenient' or similar adjective. 'the great way to keep it' is ungrammatical; correct to 'a great way to get around'. 'especially for especially for' is duplicated; remove duplication. 'short journey' should be plural 'short journeys' or 'a short journey' depending on context; plural fits general statement. These changes use correct adjectives/adverbs and noun forms to make the sentence natural.