Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise and use correct tense and clear sentence structure. Start with a direct topic sentence in past tense, then add one or two specific supporting details connected with linking words. Avoid repetition and incorrect phrases (e.g., “birthday person”).

例: Yes, I did. My grandparents gave me my first bike for my eighth birthday, and I remember learning to pedal in the park near our house. As a result, riding to school became a daily habit and one of my happiest childhood memories.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and add specific examples or reasons using linking words. Reduce hesitations and use plural/singular correctly ("bicycles are"). Provide one or two concrete contexts where bikes are used.

例: Yes, bicycles are quite popular in my country. For example, many people commute to work or school by bike, and others cycle in parks or along river paths for exercise, especially on weekends.

× Yes I did. I have a bike when I was a child as I remember my first bike was given by my grandparents as a birthday person and riding a bike was one of my fondest memories during childhood.

✓ Yes, I did. I had a bike when I was a child. I remember my first bike was given to me by my grandparents as a birthday present, and riding a bike was one of my fondest childhood memories.

The student mixed present tense 'have' with past context; use past tense 'had' to match 'when I was a child'. Also 'given by my grandparents as a birthday person' is incorrect: use passive 'given to me by my grandparents' and the noun 'present' not 'person'. Finally, 'fondest memories during childhood' is wordy; 'fondest childhood memories' is more natural. Suggestion: keep past tense consistently for past events and use correct noun 'present' and passive structure 'given to me'.

× I also ride a bike going to school and.

✓ I also rode my bike to go to school.

The sentence uses present tense 'ride' but refers to past habit; use past 'rode' or 'used to ride'. The phrase 'going to school and.' is incomplete; revise to 'rode my bike to go to school' or 'used to ride my bike to school.' Suggestion: use past-tense simple or 'used to' for habitual past actions and complete the sentence.

× Yes, bicycle is popular in my country.

✓ Yes, bicycles are popular in my country.

The student used singular 'bicycle' when speaking about general popularity; use plural 'bicycles' and plural verb 'are' to indicate general fact. Suggestion: use plural nouns for general statements about many items.

× I frequently see people riding a bicycle, uh, they use it as a transportation as well as, uh, form of exercise.

✓ I frequently see people riding bicycles; they use them as transportation as well as a form of exercise.

Use plural 'bicycles' and plural pronoun 'them' to match. 'as a transportation' is incorrect because 'transportation' is an uncountable noun used without 'a'; say 'as transportation'. Also 'form of exercise' needs the article 'a' before it. Suggestion: match plural nouns/pronouns and use uncountable noun correctly: 'as transportation' and 'as a form of exercise'.