Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is relevant but a bit long and slightly indirect. Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes or No), then briefly explain with one or two supporting details. Use linking words for clarity (for example, 'because' is fine). Also try to add a short reflection or result to make it more complete (e.g., how that affected you). Keep it under 3–4 sentences.

例: No, I didn’t have a bike as a child. My parents decided not to buy one because my older brother had an accident while riding, so they thought it was too risky. As a result, I usually walked or took public transport to school.

提案: The answer is honest but avoids addressing the question. Start with a clear opinion (e.g., 'Yes' or 'No' or 'They are somewhat popular'), then support it with a specific reason or example. Use linking phrases like 'however' or 'on the other hand' if you contrast your personal experience. Aim for 2–3 concise sentences.

例: I think bikes are fairly popular in my country, especially in cities. However, I don’t ride much myself because I’m not very sporty, and I usually prefer buses or walking for short trips.

× No, my parents did not buy me a bike because when my brother was still a child he got into an accident.

✓ No, my parents did not buy me a bike because my brother had gotten into an accident when he was a child.

The sentence mixes past simple events in a sequence where the accident occurred before the decision not to buy a bike. Use past perfect ('had gotten') to show the earlier past event. Also reorder for clarity: mention the accident first ('my brother had gotten into an accident when he was a child') then the consequence ('so my parents did not buy me a bike'). This makes the temporal relationship explicit and improves coherence.

× I can't say I think I'm not the right person to ask because I am not that sporty.

✓ I can't say; I don't think I'm the right person to ask because I'm not very sporty.

The original contains redundancy and awkward clause connection. Replace the second 'I think' structure and use 'don't think' (present simple) to express opinion. Use 'can't say' followed by a semicolon or conjunction to separate ideas. Also use 'very sporty' instead of 'that sporty' for more natural English. Ensure contractions are consistent ('I'm').