Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and organized: start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Reduce filler words (uh) and avoid repeating the same idea. Include precise time references and a brief description to make the answer vivid.

例: Yes, I did. I started riding a bike when I was seven and often biked with my family. For example, when I was ten we had a family biking day and cycled up some small hills near our town, which was fun and helped me improve my balance.

提案: Provide a clearer opinion and support it with specific reasons or examples. Use linking words (however, although, compared to) to structure contrast and comparison. Avoid vague phrases like "pretty average" without evidence — mention who rides bikes and why popularity is limited.

例: I don't think bikes are very popular in my country. Although many children ride bikes for fun, few adults use them for commuting because of poor cycling infrastructure and long distances. Compared to some European countries where cycling is common, our cycling rate is fairly low.

× Yes, uh, I used to bike when I was seven years old.

✓ Yes, I used to ride a bike when I was seven years old.

Errors: 'bike' used as a verb is acceptable informally, but 'ride a bike' is more natural; including the article 'a' before 'bike' is standard. Also remove filler 'uh' for clarity. Suggestion: use 'used to' + base verb 'ride' and include the article 'a' for countable nouns.

× Uh, I have always liked to bike with my family because when I was 10, uh, we had family biking day and we all together went to mountains, like small mountains, not like high mountains and we started to bike.

✓ I have always liked riding a bike with my family because when I was ten we had a family biking day and we all went to some small mountains and started riding.

Errors: 'liked to bike' can be acceptable but 'liked riding a bike' is more natural (verb + -ing form) and 'a' is needed before 'bike'. Use 'ten' as a word for numbers under 10 optional but consistent. 'We all together went to mountains' is ungrammatical: correct order is 'we all went to some small mountains' or 'we went together to small mountains'; article 'some' helps. Also 'not like high mountains' is informal; better 'not high mountains' or omit. Suggestion: use 'liked' with -ing form for habitual enjoyment, include articles where required, and place adverbs such as 'together' after the subject or use 'we went together'.

× Actually not in my country mostly children are riding bikes and that's the core reason why I don't think that's popular.

✓ Actually, not really; in my country mostly children ride bikes, and that's the main reason why I don't think biking is popular.

Errors: Missing punctuation and connector causing sentence structure issues. 'Mostly children are riding bikes' should be 'mostly children ride bikes' (simple present for habits). 'That's the core reason' is awkward; 'main reason' is more natural. Also 'that's popular' lacks clear subject—use 'biking is popular'. Suggestion: use simple present for general facts, choose clearer nouns ('main reason'), and include commas or connectors for clarity.

× But comparison to other countries it is pretty average, the biking rate.

✓ But compared to other countries, the biking rate is pretty average.

Errors: 'But comparison to other countries it is' is incorrect word order; use the prepositional phrase 'compared to other countries' at the start and follow with a comma. 'the biking rate' is acceptable but flows better after the clause. Suggestion: Place comparative phrase correctly and keep subject-verb proximity: 'Compared to other countries, the biking rate is pretty average.'