Politeness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Speak more clearly and correct basic grammar and vocabulary. Start with a clear topic sentence directly answering the question, e.g. “I learned to be polite from my parents.” Then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words (for example, “for example” or “they taught me to…”). Avoid unclear words and keep it to at most 3–4 short sentences.

例: I learned to be polite from my parents. For example, they always told me to greet older people with a polite ‘hello’ and to use respectful language. They also reminded me to listen carefully and say ‘please’ and ‘thank you,’ which helped me show respect.

提案: Give a direct opinion sentence and support it with one or two clear reasons using linking words like “because” and “for example.” Use correct verbs and concise phrasing. Avoid vague or repeated phrases and finish your thought in one or two supporting sentences.

例: Yes, I think being polite is very important because it helps you build good relationships and shows respect for others. For example, polite behaviour at work or school makes people more willing to cooperate, and that can boost your confidence.

提案: Answer directly and use clear vocabulary. State your main answer then give one specific example and a linking word (e.g., “for instance” or “especially”). Avoid invented phrases and correct word choice (e.g., “in all occasions” → “on all occasions” or “in every situation”).

例: I think we should be polite in all situations. For instance, being polite at work meetings or family gatherings helps maintain good relationships and makes people feel respected.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence about what you used to do, then add a specific example with a linking word like “for example.” Use simple correct phrases such as “say sorry,” “say thank you,” or “greet people.” Keep sentences short and complete.

例: As a child, I often showed politeness by saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you.’ For example, if I made a mistake I would say ‘sorry,’ and I always greeted relatives when they visited, which helped me build good relationships.

× As you know, when I was a try, my parents often taught me that I should say hello with older people to show their respect and point and I need to be online when I.

✓ As you know, when I was a child, my parents often taught me that I should say hello to older people to show my respect and attention, and I should be polite when I speak to them.

Multiple sentence structure problems: incorrect word choice 'try' should be 'child' and awkward phrasing 'say hello with older people' should be 'say hello to older people.' 'their respect' is incorrect pronoun and should be 'my respect.' 'point' is wrong word; 'attention' fits context. Fragment 'I need to be online when I' is unclear; likely 'I should be polite when I speak to them.' Suggest breaking into clear clauses, using correct nouns and pronouns, and completing fragments.

× Yes, actually being polite is very important because it play a crucial role in life and so yourself and so your identity culture as well as identity characters which boost your confident and.

✓ Yes, actually being polite is very important because it plays a crucial role in life, in shaping your identity and culture, and in building character, which boosts your confidence.

Subject-verb agreement/present tense: 'it play' should be 'it plays.' Sentence has awkward phrasing 'so yourself and so your identity culture as well as identity characters' which needs rewording to 'in shaping your identity and culture, and in building character.' 'boost your confident' should be 'boosts your confidence' (verb agreement and correct noun). Suggest ensuring subject and verb agree and using clear noun phrases.

× Well I think we should be poor lines in all occasions, non exceptions with any specific event because it's so joining identity and build your relationships with everyone which boost your confidence.

✓ Well, I think we should be polite on all occasions, with no exceptions, because it helps form our identity and builds relationships with everyone, which boosts our confidence.

Several errors: 'poor lines' is incorrect; correct word is 'polite.' Preposition 'in all occasions' should be 'on all occasions.' 'non exceptions' should be 'no exceptions.' Phrase 'it's so joining identity' is unclear; better 'it helps form our identity.' Verb forms need consistency: 'build your relationships' -> 'builds relationships' and 'which boost your confidence' -> 'which boosts our confidence.' Suggest choosing correct vocabulary and maintaining subject-verb agreement.

× As I would try my parents always taught me that I need I should be say times or real sorry to everyone to worry so my respect to them which built my relationship.

✓ As a child, my parents always taught me that I should say sorry when I hurt someone and show my respect to them, which helped build my relationships.

Multiple problems: 'As I would try' is incorrect—use 'As a child.' Redundant 'I need I should be' must be simplified. 'be say times or real sorry' is ungrammatical; intended meaning is 'say sorry when I hurt someone.' 'to worry so my respect to them' unclear; use 'show my respect to them.' Tense consistency: 'which built my relationship' -> 'which helped build my relationships.' Suggest simplifying clauses, fixing word choice, and keeping consistent past tense.