Headphones— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes, I use headphones often), correct grammar and avoid contradictions. Use linking words and give one or two specific reasons with examples. Limit to 3–4 sentences.

例: Yes, I use headphones often. I mainly wear them when I listen to music or practice English because they make the sound clearer and help me focus. For example, I use them when listening to podcasts to improve my listening skills.

提案: Begin with a clear topic sentence naming the brand and type, then give specific features and a brief reason why you like them. Avoid unclear or irrelevant sentences. Use linking words to connect ideas and keep it within 3–4 sentences.

例: I use a Panasonic over-ear headphone that was made in Japan. It has good sound quality and comfortable ear cushions, so I can listen for long periods. Because of that, I always store it carefully to avoid damage or loss.

提案: Provide a clear main sentence and then specific contexts with linking words (for example, when, because). Give one brief example of a situation and keep sentences natural and grammatically correct.

例: I usually use headphones when I listen to music or practice English. For example, I wear them while listening to Mariah Carey or while doing listening exercises because they make the sound much clearer and help me concentrate.

提案: Start with a direct statement, then explain the reason briefly and give one clear example. Correct repetitive words and use linking phrases like 'because' or 'when' to connect ideas.

例: I wouldn't use headphones when someone is talking to me because they block out external sound. For instance, I avoid wearing them at home if a family member needs to communicate with me.

提案: Answer directly, then describe specific comfort features (padding, weight) and compare briefly if needed. Fix grammar and avoid vague praise. Keep to 2–3 concise sentences.

例: Yes, my Panasonic headphones are very comfortable. The padded earcups and light weight mean they sit comfortably on my head without hurting my ears, unlike some cheaper models.

× Yes, I use the headphones a lot.

✓ Yes, I use headphones a lot.

The definite article 'the' is unnecessary before a general plural noun 'headphones'. Use no article for general statements about something in general. Suggestion: omit 'the' when speaking about headphones in general contexts.

× I use the headphones when I'm listening to my favorite artists like Mariah Carey as far as English learning practices.

✓ I use headphones when I'm listening to my favorite artists like Mariah Carey for English learning practice.

Awkward phrasing and incorrect article 'the' for general reference. 'As far as' is informal and unnecessary; 'for' correctly expresses purpose. Use singular 'practice' if referring to the activity in general.

× Using headphones is always not rewarding experience for me.

✓ Using headphones is not always a rewarding experience for me.

Word order is incorrect: 'not always' should come before the adjective phrase. Also missing article 'a' before 'rewarding experience'. Place negative adverb before 'always' and add 'a'.

× Not just make the music better, but the sound clearer.

✓ They not only make the music better, but also make the sound clearer.

Fragment lacking subject and verb. Use 'they' to refer to headphones and 'not only... but also' parallel structure; include verb 'make' in both clauses.

× 100 Panasonic headphone which was made in Japan.

✓ A Panasonic headphones model that was made in Japan.

Original lacks article and has singular/plural mismatch. Use 'a' or 'the' and plural 'headphones' or specify 'headphone' model. 'Which' changed to 'that' for restrictive clause, though 'which' could be acceptable with a comma.

× The headphone quality is pretty decent.

✓ The headphones' quality is pretty decent.

When referring to quality of the headphones, use plural possessive 'headphones'' or rephrase 'The quality of the headphones is pretty decent.' This fixes noun-number and possessive form.

× You escape the music or the song a day.

✓ You can escape into music or songs for a day.

Original is unclear and unidiomatic. Likely intended meaning is to escape into music; add modal 'can' and preposition 'into', and use plural 'songs' or 'music' without article.

× Bad effect.

✓ That can have a bad effect.

Fragment; add subject and modal verb to form a complete clause and clarify meaning.

× I always keep my headphones in order not to lose it.

✓ I always keep my headphones in order not to lose them.

Pronoun 'it' does not agree with plural 'headphones'. Use plural pronoun 'them'.

× I use headphones when I'm listening to my favorite music artist like Mariah Carey, Michael Jackson, etcetera.

✓ I use headphones when I'm listening to my favorite music artists like Mariah Carey and Michael Jackson.

Use plural 'artists' when listing multiple people. Also 'etcetera' is unnecessary; use 'and' before final item.

× I also use headphones for English practices listening and even speaking as well.

✓ I also use headphones for English listening and speaking practice.

Awkward noun order 'practices listening'. Combine into 'listening and speaking practice' and remove redundant 'as well'. Use 'for' correctly.

× They make the sound that's so much better and clearer.

✓ They make the sound much better and clearer.

'That's' is unnecessary; use comparative adverbs 'much better and clearer'. 'So much' is informal and redundant here.

× I won't use the headphones if someone, my friend or my family member talking to me constantly because the headphones have a really good soundproof ability so I I would not be able to hear them speaking one on the headphone.

✓ I won't use headphones if someone, like a friend or family member, is talking to me, because the headphones are very soundproof and I would not be able to hear them.

Multiple issues: unnecessary 'the' before headphones, missing auxiliary 'is' for 'talking', awkward phrase 'soundproof ability' (use 'are very soundproof'), repeated 'I', and 'one on the headphone' is incorrect. Simplify and use proper clauses and punctuation.

× Yes, my Panasonic headphones just so much comfortable.

✓ Yes, my Panasonic headphones are just so comfortable.

Missing verb 'are'. Also 'so much comfortable' is unidiomatic; use 'so comfortable' or 'very comfortable'.

× You just protect my ears.

✓ They just protect my ears.

Pronoun 'you' incorrectly refers to headphones; use 'they' for headphones. Keep present simple 'protect' is fine.

× It sits comfortably on my head, unlike some headphones which are not quite as comfortable and ear hurting.

✓ They sit comfortably on my head, unlike some headphones which are not as comfortable and can hurt my ears.

Subject 'It' should be plural 'They' for headphones. 'Ear hurting' is incorrect; use 'can hurt my ears' or 'are painful to the ears'. Adjust comparative 'not quite as comfortable' to 'not as comfortable'.

× My headphone is just an extremely good one.

✓ My headphones are just extremely good.

Singular 'headphone' conflicts with earlier plural; use plural 'headphones' and correct verb 'are'. 'An extremely good one' is awkward; simpler form preferred.