Headphones— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and coherent. Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes/No and preference), then give one specific reason with a simple linking word. Avoid repetition and incorrect phrases like “harmful for a years.” Use correct tense and article forms.

例: Yes, I use headphones sometimes, but I usually prefer the speaker. I find that prolonged use of headphones can be uncomfortable and may affect hearing over time, so I avoid them for long listening sessions.

提案: Clarify the types and use one clear phrase for each (e.g., earphones, over‑ear headphones, hands‑free). Give a short reason for when you choose each type. Avoid vague words like “country” or repeating phrases.

例: I mainly use in‑ear earphones and a hands‑free headset. I use earphones for private listening because they block out noise, while I use a hands‑free headset when I need to talk on the phone or be more comfortable for long calls.

提案: Provide a clear topic sentence and add one or two specific situations with linking words. Correct grammar (e.g., I use them when I exercise or train at home) and avoid hesitations.

例: I usually use headphones when I exercise or train at home. For example, I listen to workout playlists while running and use them to follow online fitness classes in my room.

提案: Answer directly and provide one or two clear reasons with linking words. Fix grammar (use singular/plural correctly) and avoid unclear phrases like “side happen in front of my eyes.” Mention safety as the main reason.

例: I avoid using headphones while driving or crossing the road because they reduce my awareness of traffic sounds. For safety, I prefer using the car’s speaker or not listening to anything in these situations.

提案: Give a clear opinion followed by one precise reason and avoid confusing time references like “first nine years.” Use correct sentence structure and a linking word to connect ideas.

例: Personally, I find headphones uncomfortable after long use because they put pressure on my ears and cause pain. Therefore, I prefer using speakers for long listening sessions to avoid ear discomfort.

× Yeah, I do use headphones, but I prefer using speaker because headphones, headphones some are sometimes are harmful for a years. So no.

✓ Yeah, I do use headphones, but I prefer using the speaker because some headphones can be harmful over the years. So no.

The original contains incorrect word forms and redundant words. 'Prefer using speaker' should be 'prefer using the speaker' (article and noun agreement). 'Headphones, headphones some are sometimes are harmful for a years' is ungrammatical: use 'some headphones can be harmful over the years' to express general possibility and duration. Use 'can' as a modal for possibility and 'over the years' for duration.

× I use country and earphones and only earphones and hands free.

✓ I use earphones and a hands-free set.

The original uses 'country' mistakenly and repeats conjunctions. Replace with the correct nouns and a clear conjunction: 'earphones and a hands-free set'. Use 'a' before 'hands-free set' to form a noun phrase.

× I have no other options when I need it privacy.

✓ I have no other options when I need privacy.

'Need it privacy' is incorrect. Remove the unnecessary pronoun 'it' and keep the verb 'need' followed directly by the noun 'privacy'. Also no preposition is required between 'need' and 'privacy'.

× So I would go into these two options.

✓ So I would choose one of these two options.

'Go into these two options' is awkward and unidiomatic. Use 'choose one of these two options' to clearly express selection. This corrects sentence structure and idiomatic usage.

× When I have to do exercise or I have, I have to do some training at my own room, so.

✓ When I have to exercise or do some training in my own room.

Use the base verb 'exercise' rather than 'do exercise' for conciseness; 'at my own room' is incorrect preposition and possessive: use 'in my own room'. Remove filler repetitions 'I have, I have'.

× When I'm driving, that's the best time. You don't have to use earphones because it can cause the accidents.

✓ When I'm driving, that's when you shouldn't use earphones because they can cause accidents.

'You don't have to use earphones' implies obligation is unnecessary, not prohibition. Use 'shouldn't' to advise against doing something. 'It can cause the accidents' has wrong pronoun and article; use plural 'they can cause accidents' to refer to earphones and generalize.

× Most of the time I even side happen in front of my in front of my eyes.

✓ Most of the time I even see accidents happen right in front of my eyes.

The original has misused words 'side' and duplicated 'in front of my'. Replace with 'see accidents happen right in front of my eyes' to convey witnessing events. Use 'see' as correct verb and 'accidents' as object.

× So it's really dangerous to use when you are driving or crossing the line, crossing the road.

✓ So it's really dangerous to use them when you are driving or crossing the road.

Add the object 'them' to clarify what 'use' refers to. 'Crossing the line' is unclear; 'crossing the road' is appropriate. Keep parallel structure 'driving or crossing the road'.

× No headphones, very uh, wearing headphones are not comfortable for at least for me,

✓ No, wearing headphones is not comfortable for me,

Remove the redundant 'headphones' at the start; treat 'wearing headphones' as a gerund phrase that takes singular verb 'is'. 'For at least for me' is ungrammatical; use 'for me'.

× because after some time I first nine years starting to hurt it really bad condition for me.

✓ because after some time my ears start to hurt badly because of previous damage over the years.

Original mixes time phrases incorrectly. 'I first nine years starting to hurt' is incoherent. If the speaker means long-term damage, express it as 'previous damage over the years' or 'my ears start to hurt after some time'. Use 'start to hurt' and the adverb 'badly' correctly.

× So I usually go to speakers because that way I don't have to hurt my ears.

✓ So I usually use speakers because that way I don't hurt my ears.

Use 'use speakers' rather than 'go to speakers'. Also 'don't have to hurt my ears' is incorrect; say 'I don't hurt my ears' or 'they don't hurt my ears' to express avoidance of pain.