Music— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise, correct grammar, and avoid fillers. Start with a clear topic sentence, then briefly explain why with one specific detail. Use correct verb forms and remove hesitations (umm).

例: I prefer happy music because it has upbeat rhythms that lift my mood. For example, I often play lively pop songs when I need energy during my morning routine.

提案: Fix subject-verb agreement and sentence structure. Give one clear main point and a linked additional detail using a linking word (e.g., 'and' or 'also'). Avoid contradictions (excited vs. concentrate) by explaining how it affects you in different ways.

例: Yes, it does. It makes me feel more excited, and it also entertains me while I study, helping me concentrate better on repetitive tasks.

提案: Answer directly (Yes/No) using correct tense, then give a specific supporting detail. Replace vague phrases and fix grammar (e.g., 'I haven't' or 'I haven't taken any'). Keep to two sentences maximum.

例: No, I haven't taken any formal music classes. However, I often listen to background music during online lessons because it helps me stay focused.

提案: Give a direct answer and remove fillers. Use correct verb forms and provide specific examples of activities. Explain briefly how music helps in each case using a linking word like 'for example' or 'such as'.

例: Yes, I always listen to music while doing other things. For example, I play music when I'm doing household chores or working under a deadline because it helps me stay motivated and reduce stress.

× I do like umm happy music because it's has a happy rhythms, makes me feel comfortable while I listen to it.

✓ I do like happy music because it has happy rhythms and makes me feel comfortable while I listen to it.

Errors: extra 'do' is acceptable for emphasis but optional; 'it's has' combines contraction 'it is' with 'has' incorrectly — should be 'it has'; 'a happy rhythms' mixes singular article 'a' with plural 'rhythms' and is redundant. Also missing conjunction 'and' between clauses. Suggestion: Remove the contraction 'it's' before 'has', use 'it has', remove 'a' before 'rhythms' or change to singular 'a happy rhythm', and join clauses with 'and' for clarity.

× Yes, of course it are not only make me feel more excited, it's also makes me feel entertained and help me to concentrate at my lesson.

✓ Yes, of course it not only makes me feel more excited, it also makes me feel entertained and helps me concentrate on my lessons.

Errors: 'it are' is wrong subject-verb agreement; use 'it' with singular verbs. Structure 'not only ... also ...' requires proper verb forms and parallelism. 'Make' should be 'makes' for third person singular. 'It's also makes' incorrectly repeats contraction 'it is' with 'makes'; use 'it also makes'. 'Help' should be 'helps' for third person singular. Preposition 'at' with 'lesson' is incorrect; use 'concentrate on' and plural 'lessons' or 'my lesson'. Suggestion: Ensure verbs agree with singular subject 'it', maintain parallel verb forms, and use correct preposition 'concentrate on'.

× Umm no I'm not, but when I'm studying our life lesson or I have attend an online class, I will listen to music and umm, study.

✓ Umm no, I'm not, but when I'm studying our life lesson or attending an online class, I listen to music and study.

Errors: 'I'm not' is vague—context suggests 'I haven't' or 'I haven't taken any music classes'; however per allowed types we address pronoun/verb forms: 'I have attend' is incorrect; should be 'attending' or 'attend' with correct auxiliary. 'When I'm studying our life lesson or I have attend an online class' is ungrammatical and awkward. Also tense consistency: use present simple or present continuous; better: 'when I'm studying ... or attending an online class' and 'I listen to music and study' (habitual). Suggestion: Use the -ing form after 'when' for simultaneous actions, remove redundant 'I' before 'attending', and use clear negative if meaning 'I haven't' for classes.

× Yes, of course, for 100% umm, I always, umm, maintains this umm, habit when I'm doing chores or, uh, done my deadline or some, uh, excitement.

✓ Yes, of course, 100%—I always maintain this habit when I'm doing chores, meeting a deadline, or feeling excited.

Errors: 'I always ... maintains' has incorrect subject-verb agreement: 'I' requires 'maintain' not 'maintains'. 'Done my deadline' is incorrect verb form; use 'meeting a deadline' or 'when I have a deadline'. 'Some excitement' is vague; better 'feeling excited'. Suggestion: Use base verb after 'I always' (I always maintain), use appropriate expressions for deadlines ('meeting a deadline') and use parallel gerund phrases for consistency ('doing chores, meeting a deadline, or feeling excited').