Music— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and use a clear topic sentence, then give one specific reason with a linking word. Avoid repetition and filler words. Also correct small grammar: say “it depends on my mood,” and avoid phrases like “depressing thoughts” without brief explanation.

例: I usually prefer happy music because it matches my upbeat mood. For example, upbeat pop songs help me relax and focus when I'm studying, whereas sad songs tend to make me dwell on negative memories.

提案: Start with a direct answer, then explain clearly using linking words. Avoid hesitations and self-corrections. Use precise vocabulary such as “energised” or “uplifted” instead of vague phrases.

例: Yes, happy music definitely energises me. For instance, fast rhythms and bright melodies make me feel more alert and motivated, so I often play them when I need a mood boost.

提案: Answer directly then add a clear reason with linking words. Remove filler sounds (uh) and correct grammar: say “I took piano and vocal lessons” and “I would like to take music classes now to protect my voice.” Be specific about what you want to learn.

例: Yes, I took piano and vocal lessons. Now I would like to take breathing and vocal technique classes so that I can sing more safely and avoid straining my voice.

提案: Give a direct answer and one or two specific examples of activities where you listen to music, using linking words to connect ideas. Avoid hyperbole like “literally do everything” and repeat less.

例: Yes, I often listen to music while studying and cooking. For example, mellow instrumental tracks help me concentrate when I study, and upbeat songs make cooking feel more enjoyable.

× Actually it depends on which mood I am in and usually I prefer more happy music because I don't really like being sad.

✓ Actually, it depends on which mood I am in, and usually I prefer happier music because I don't really like being sad.

The phrase 'more happy music' is an incorrect comparative form; 'happy' as a base adjective should use the comparative 'happier' (Grammar Problem Type ID 6). Also add commas for clarity. Suggestion: use comparative adjective 'happier' when comparing degrees of an adjective.

× It always makes me think about my depressing thoughts.

✓ It always makes me think about depressing thoughts.

Using the definite article 'my' before 'depressing thoughts' is unnecessary and slightly awkward; removing 'my' makes the sentence more natural. The issue falls under present tense/word choice (Grammar Problem Type ID 6). Suggestion: omit 'my' or rephrase to 'my depressing thoughts bother me' if possessive emphasis is intended.

× Yes, happy music makes me feel more excited and usually it's more not like exciting and more like feeling alive.

✓ Yes, happy music makes me feel excited; it's not so much about being excited as about feeling alive.

The original contains confusing structure 'more not like exciting and more like feeling alive.' This is a sentence structure issue (Grammar Problem Type ID 26). Correction rearranges and clarifies the contrast using 'not so much... as...' Suggestion: use clear comparative structures when contrasting feelings.

× I like this feeling so much.

✓ I like this feeling so much.

This sentence is grammatically correct and needs no change. It correctly uses the noun 'feeling' and present tense 'like'. (No error from the provided list.)

× I meant to being alive.

✓ I meant being alive.

'Meant to being' is incorrect. If the speaker intended to express that they meant 'feeling alive,' the correct form is 'I meant being alive' or better 'I meant feeling alive.' The error is misuse of verb patterns with -ing (Grammar Problem Type ID 8). Suggestion: use 'meant' + noun/gerund without 'to', or rephrase as 'I meant I feel alive.'

× I'm into living, you know?

✓ I'm into living, you know?

This sentence is acceptable colloquial English and fits the context; no grammatical correction needed (Grammar Problem Type ID 26 not applicable).

× Yes, I have taken music classes.

✓ Yes, I have taken music classes.

This sentence is grammatically correct for describing past experience with present relevance. No change necessary. (Matches present perfect usage.)

× It was piano and vocal.

✓ They were piano and vocal lessons.

'It was piano and vocal' is vague and treats classes as singular 'it.' The correct phrasing uses plural 'lessons' and plural pronoun 'they' or 'They were piano and vocal lessons.' This is an article/structure issue (Grammar Problem Type ID 22/26). Suggestion: identify 'lessons' explicitly and match subject number.

× Uh, I would like to take a music classes now because I want to be sure that, uh, my singing won't hurt my body.

✓ Uh, I would like to take music classes now because I want to be sure that my singing won't hurt my body.

'A music classes' mixes singular article 'a' with plural 'classes.' Remove 'a' to match plural noun: 'take music classes.' This is an article/number agreement error (Grammar Problem Type ID 22). Also keep 'would like' for polite present desire; tense is fine.

× Yes, I listen to music while doing other things and I'm really into it.

✓ Yes, I listen to music while doing other things, and I'm really into it.

Sentence is grammatically correct but needs a comma before coordinating conjunction for readability. This is a present tense correct construction (Grammar Problem Type ID 6). Suggestion: add comma for clarity.

× I cannot stand living without music.

✓ I cannot stand living without music.

This sentence is correct and natural; no correction needed. 'Cannot stand' + gerund is correct usage.

× I literally do everything with music.

✓ I literally do everything with music.

This sentence is grammatically fine and idiomatic; no change needed.

× It's just my passion.

✓ It's just my passion.

This sentence is correct; no change needed.

× I can't spend a day without any music, without singing.

✓ I can't spend a day without music or singing.

'Without any music, without singing' is repetitive and slightly awkward. Streamline with 'without music or singing.' This is a present tense/word choice issue (Grammar Problem Type ID 6). Suggestion: use parallel structure when listing negatives.