Music— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve grammar and coherence: use correct verb forms and articles, reduce redundancy, and keep within 3–4 sentences. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details with linking words. For example, say why you prefer happy music and give concrete situations or song examples.

例: I prefer happy music because it is upbeat and energizes me. For example, I often listen to pop or electronic tracks like Dua Lipa or Daft Punk when I exercise or work, because their fast tempo helps me stay motivated and focused.

提案: Fix tense and article errors, avoid repetition, and use linking words for coherence. Give a concise topic sentence and one clear reason with a short example of how it helps concentration.

例: Yes. Upbeat music usually makes me feel more energized and excited, so I play cheerful songs while working. For instance, listening to lively instrumental tracks helps me concentrate on tasks like studying or writing reports.

提案: Correct verb tense and word choice, clarify meaning, and avoid unclear words. Provide a direct answer followed by a clear reason and one brief consequence or reflection. Keep sentences simple and precise.

例: No, I did not take music classes when I was young because my parents wanted me to focus on academic subjects such as math and science. As a result, I concentrated on school and missed the chance to learn an instrument.

提案: This answer is natural and clear but can be improved by varying vocabulary and adding a short specific example of a song or playlist. Use one linking phrase to connect reason and example.

例: Yes, I often listen to music while doing household chores like washing dishes or cooking because it makes the tasks more enjoyable. For example, I play a mellow acoustic playlist when I cook and an upbeat pop playlist while cleaning to keep my energy up.

× 'Generally, I prefer happy music because it's upbeat, make me feel energized.'

✓ 'Generally, I prefer happy music because it's upbeat and makes me feel energized.'

'make' is incorrect because the subject 'it' (referring to music) requires the third person singular verb form 'makes'. Also add the conjunction 'and' to connect clauses smoothly. Suggestion: use subject-verb agreement and link clauses with appropriate conjunctions.'

× 'I often listen to music like a pop or electronic music when I'm working or exercising.'

✓ 'I often listen to music like pop or electronic music when I'm working or exercising.'

'a pop' is incorrect because 'music' types are uncountable here; use 'pop' without the article. Alternatively, say 'a pop song' or 'an electronic song' if referring to individual tracks. Suggestion: use uncountable genre names without articles or change to 'song' for countable reference.'

× 'That why the fast sound help me.'

✓ 'That's why fast music helps me.'

'That why' is missing the verb 'is' and contraction; 'the fast sound' is awkward—use 'fast music'. 'help' must be 'helps' to agree with singular 'music'. Suggestion: use 'That's why' and match subject-verb agreement.'

× 'Yes, I think upbeat music, usually in happy music, make me feel more energized and excited, so I often listen to a cheerful music when I'm working because it helped me concentrate my task.'

✓ 'Yes, I think upbeat music, usually happy music, makes me feel more energized and excited, so I often listen to cheerful music when I'm working because it helps me concentrate on my tasks.'

'make' should be 'makes' to agree with singular collective 'music'. 'a cheerful music' is incorrect—use uncountable 'cheerful music' or 'a cheerful song'. 'helped' should be present tense 'helps' to match habitual action. Add 'on' after 'concentrate' and plural 'tasks' or 'my task' depending on meaning. Suggestion: ensure subject-verb agreement and correct preposition use.'

× 'I never enroll in music classes when I was young because my parents pushed me to focus on UH academic subject like math and science in high school.'

✓ 'I never enrolled in music classes when I was young because my parents pushed me to focus on academic subjects like math and science in high school.'

'enroll' should be past tense 'enrolled' to match 'when I was young'. 'UH' appears to be a typo and should be removed. 'subject' should be plural 'subjects' to match examples. Suggestion: use consistent past tense and correct plural nouns.'

× 'As a result, I concentrate olive academic in my study.'

✓ 'As a result, I concentrated on academic subjects in my studies.'

'concentrate' should be past tense 'concentrated' to match previous past context. 'olive academic' seems to be a typo; replace with 'on academic subjects'. Add preposition 'on' and plural 'studies' or 'my study' depending on meaning. Suggestion: correct typos, use correct preposition, and maintain tense consistency.'

× 'I often listen to music while doing household chores such as washing the dish or cooking.'

✓ 'I often listen to music while doing household chores such as washing the dishes or cooking.'

'washing the dish' is incorrect; use plural 'dishes' for typical chores. Suggestion: use plural when referring to general items in household chores.'

× 'I think it helps me relax and make boring tasks more enjoyable.'

✓ 'I think it helps me relax and makes boring tasks more enjoyable.'

'make' should be 'makes' to agree with singular subject 'it' (referring to music). Suggestion: ensure subject-verb agreement in coordinated verbs referring to the same subject.'