Music— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Clarify grammar (subject-verb agreement and phrasing), avoid redundancy, and keep answer within 3–4 sentences. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific supporting detail with a linking phrase. For example, correct errors: ‘it motivates me’ and ‘easier’.

例: I prefer happy music because it relaxes me and lifts my mood. For example, when I exercise I play upbeat songs to stay motivated and make my workout feel easier.

提案: Avoid vague or incorrect phrases (e.g. ‘give me a sense of freedom and exercise’ is confusing). Be concise and use linking words like ‘for example’ or ‘because’ to connect idea and detail. Provide one clear reason and one concrete example.

例: Yes, happy music makes me feel more excited because it increases my energy and positivity. For example, when I exercise I listen to upbeat tracks to stay motivated and maintain a high energy level.

提案: Use consistent tense and avoid irrelevant future-tense details. Start with a clear topic sentence about past lessons, then add a specific supporting detail about what you learned. Combine related ideas to stay within sentence limit.

例: Yes, I took music lessons every day in primary school, and I attended singing classes. These lessons helped me learn to read music and improve my pitch.

提案: Answer is mostly good but slightly repetitive of earlier responses. Keep it concise and add a different example or brief contrast to show range (e.g. other activities). Use one linking word and one specific example.

例: Yes, I often listen to cheerful music while exercising because it motivates me and keeps my energy high. I also sometimes play soft instrumental music while studying to help me concentrate.

× Personally, I prefer happy music because it makes me relax and lifts my mood.

✓ Personally, I prefer happy music because it makes me feel relaxed and lifts my mood.

The original uses 'makes me relax' which is awkward; 'make someone relax' is possible but here the correct adjective form 'relaxed' or the phrase 'feel relaxed' is natural. Use 'feel relaxed' to describe emotional state.

× For instance, while I'm exercising I play cheerful songs because it motivate me and makes ordinary tasks more easy.

✓ For instance, while I'm exercising I play cheerful songs because they motivate me and make ordinary tasks easier.

Subject 'cheerful songs' is plural so verbs must be plural: 'motivate' not 'motivate' already present but missing agreement with 'they'; original used 'it motivate' which is incorrect. Also 'more easy' is nonstandard; use comparative adjective 'easier'. Replace 'it' with 'they' and use 'make' and 'easier'.

× Yes, happy music can lift my mood and give me a sense of freedom and exercise.

✓ Yes, happy music can lift my mood and give me a sense of freedom and energy.

The word 'exercise' is a noun meaning physical activity, but context requires a noun expressing vitality; 'energy' fits. 'Exercise' here is incorrect collocation.

× For instance, when I do exercise, I play cheerful songs to motivate me and keep my energy high.

✓ For instance, when I exercise, I play cheerful songs to motivate myself and keep my energy high.

Use the verb form 'exercise' rather than 'do exercise' for natural English. Also reflexive pronoun 'myself' is required after 'motivate' when the subject and object are the same.

× I took music lessons every day when I was in primary school and we will have an end of term exam in the semester.

✓ I took music lessons every day when I was in primary school and we had an end-of-term exam that semester.

The sentence mixes past ('took') with future 'will have' in a past context; maintain past tense 'had'. Also 'end of term' should be hyphenated as 'end-of-term' and 'in the semester' is awkward; use 'that semester'.

× I attended singing classes which helped me learn to read music better.

✓ I attended singing classes, which helped me learn to read music better.

This sentence is grammatically correct but requires a comma before 'which' to introduce a nonrestrictive clause. Provide punctuation correction rather than verb change.

× Personally, I usually listen to cheerful songs when I exercise because it motivates me and keeps my energy high.

✓ Personally, I usually listen to cheerful songs when I exercise because they motivate me and keep my energy high.

'Cheerful songs' is plural, so use plural verbs and pronoun: 'they motivate' and 'keep', not 'it motivates'.