Music— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence stating your preference, correct verb forms, and avoid repetition. Add one specific example and a linking word to explain when you choose each type.

例: I prefer smooth or mellow music to clearly ‘sad’ or ‘happy’ songs. For example, when I’m working or relaxing I usually play smooth jazz because its steady rhythm helps me focus, whereas I choose energetic tracks for workouts.

提案: Answer directly and use correct grammar and linking words. Keep it concise and give a specific reason and brief example of how happy music affects you or others.

例: Yes. Happy music often makes me feel more energetic because of its fast tempo and bright melodies. For instance, upbeat pop songs lift my mood and give me more motivation to exercise.

提案: Use correct negative contraction and verb forms, and give two clear, concise reasons using linking words (first, second). Avoid repetition and clarify the second reason (lack of patience to learn).

例: No, I haven’t taken any music classes. First, I don’t have enough time because of work. Second, I don’t feel patient enough to practice regularly and learn an instrument properly.

提案: Give a full sentence to answer directly, fix grammar and word choice (concentrate -> concentrating; surroundings noises -> surrounding noise), and add a brief specific example or benefit of listening while multitasking.

例: Yes, I always listen to music while doing other things. When I’m concentrating on work, exercising, or cleaning my room, I put on my AirPods to block out surrounding noise and help me stay focused.

× I think when I need to work or I need to relax I will preferred smooth jazz or other smooth music.

✓ I think when I need to work or relax I prefer smooth jazz or other smooth music.

The original sentence uses 'will preferred', which mixes future auxiliary 'will' with past participle 'preferred' and is incorrect. The meaning describes habitual or present preferences (not a specific future event), so present simple 'prefer' is appropriate. Also 'I need to relax' can be shortened to 'relax' for parallel structure. Suggestion: Use present simple for habitual preferences: 'I prefer'.

× Yes, I think there's a connect between music, technologies and and emotions.

✓ Yes, I think there's a connection between music, technology and emotions.

The phrase 'a connect' is incorrect; the correct noun is 'a connection'. 'Technologies' is plural but here the abstract field is better expressed as the uncountable 'technology'. Also there was a duplicated 'and'. Suggestion: Use 'a connection' and 'technology' when referring to the general concept.

× When the people heard the happy music, they will feel excited and boosted.

✓ When people hear happy music, they feel excited and uplifted.

Use of 'the people' is unnatural; 'people' is more general. Tense mismatch: 'heard' (past) with 'will feel' (future) is inconsistent. For a general truth, use present simple: 'people hear' and 'they feel'. 'Boosted' is informal/awkward here; 'uplifted' or 'energized' fits better. Suggestion: Use present simple for general statements and choose a more appropriate adjective.

× No, I haven't take music classes because first I don't have enough time and second, I think I'm not a patient persons to learn the things I think I'm not really.

✓ No, I haven't taken music classes because, first, I don't have enough time, and second, I don't think I'm patient enough to learn them.

'Haven't take' is incorrect; after 'have' use the past participle 'taken' (present perfect). The phrase 'I'm not a patient persons' mixes singular and plural and misuses noun form; 'patient' is an adjective, so say 'I'm not patient enough'. 'To learn the things I think I'm not really' is redundant and ungrammatical; replace with 'to learn them' or 'to learn music'. Suggestion: Use present perfect formation 'haven't taken' and simplify to 'I'm not patient enough to learn them.'

× Yes, always do. When I'm concentrate in my work or doing exercise, even clean the room, I will put on the Airpods and turn on the music to block the surroundings noises.

✓ Yes, I always do. When I'm concentrating on my work, exercising, or even cleaning the room, I put on my AirPods and turn on music to block surrounding noises.

Several issues: 'Yes, always do.' needs subject 'I' => 'Yes, I always do.' 'When I'm concentrate' is incorrect; after 'I am' use the -ing form: 'concentrating'. Use 'concentrating on' (preposition). 'Doing exercise' is better as 'exercising'. Future 'I will put on' is unnecessary for habitual action; use present simple 'I put on'. 'the Airpods' should be 'my AirPods' (possessive and correct capitalization) and 'the surroundings noises' is incorrect; 'surrounding noises' or 'surrounding noise' is correct. Suggestion: Use present continuous for actions in progress ('concentrating'), present simple for habitual actions ('I put on'), correct prepositions and possessives.