Music— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition and grammatical errors, and give a brief specific reason. Use linking words only if adding one detail. Watch verb forms (e.g., “listening to happy music”), articles and pronouns.

例: I prefer happy music. It helps me relax after a busy day and lifts my mood, especially upbeat pop songs with lively rhythms.

提案: Answer directly and avoid fillers. Start with a clear yes/no and one concise reason, then give a brief specific example. Use linking words like “because” or “so” correctly. Reduce hesitations and correct vocabulary (e.g., “bored”).

例: Yes. Happy music usually makes me feel more energetic because lively rhythms put me in a better mood; for example, when I have a break from work I play upbeat songs to feel refreshed.

提案: This is a good short answer but improve naturalness by giving one brief reason and possibly a contrast. Use correct phrasing like “not particularly fond of learning music” and avoid double negatives.

例: No, I haven't taken any music classes because I'm not particularly fond of formal music lessons; instead, I prefer learning songs informally by listening and practicing on my own.

提案: Be concise and correct collocations (e.g., “gives me extra energy”). Start with a clear topic sentence and add one specific example of activities and a linking phrase like “for example” or “such as.”

例: Yes, I often listen to music while doing other tasks. It gives me extra energy and improves my mood; for example, I play upbeat playlists when cleaning or exercising.

× I would say I love to listen happy music because it gives me a sense of satisfaction and relaxation after a busy schedule.

✓ I would say I love listening to happy music because it gives me a sense of satisfaction and relaxation after a busy schedule.

The verb 'listen' should be followed by the gerund form 'listening' when used after 'love' to express preference, and the phrasal structure requires the preposition 'to' ('listen to music'). Use 'love listening to happy music'. Suggestion: use 'love listening to' + object.

× I always prefer happy music because it gives me a great pleasure.

✓ I always prefer happy music because it gives me great pleasure.

'Pleasure' is an uncountable noun here, so it should not take the indefinite article 'a'. Also 'great pleasure' is the correct collocation. Suggestion: remove 'a' before uncountable nouns like 'pleasure'.

× I don't make me sad anymore.

✓ It doesn't make me sad anymore.

The original sentence incorrectly uses the subject 'I' with 'make me', which is ungrammatical. The correct subject is the music (or 'it'), so use 'It doesn't make me sad anymore.' Suggestion: ensure subject matches the verb and object pronoun is used correctly.

× Yes, definitely happy me happy music makes me always feel uh more excited, uh, because uh, whenever I get uh uh, some free time and if I feel uh bore, I think uh, we at that time, uh, uh, the happy music makes me uh feel more excited.

✓ Yes, definitely: happy music always makes me feel more excited because whenever I have some free time and feel bored, the happy music makes me feel more excited.

Multiple issues: extraneous words and repetition removed; 'happy me happy music' is incorrect phrasing; adverb placement 'always' should come before the main verb; 'bore' should be the adjective 'bored'; 'we at that time' is wrong pronoun and unnecessary. Suggestion: simplify sentence, place adverbs before verbs ('always makes'), use correct adjective 'bored', and use consistent subject 'the happy music' or 'it'.

× No, not really, because I'm not quite fond of learning music so I didn't take any music classes.

✓ No, not really, because I'm not quite fond of learning music, so I didn't take any music classes.

Comma added for clarity between clauses. The tense use is acceptable because the speaker explains a general dislike leading to a past action. Suggestion: keep tense consistent; the sentence is correct after adding punctuation.

× Yes, definitely. I love listening to music while doing other things because I think it gives me a extra energy and I feel more happy while doing things besides listening to music.

✓ Yes, definitely. I love listening to music while doing other things because I think it gives me extra energy and makes me feel happier while I do other activities.

Use 'extra energy' without the article 'a' because 'energy' is uncountable. 'Feel more happy' is less natural than 'feel happier' (comparative adjective). Also simplify the second clause to avoid repetition ('doing things besides listening to music' is redundant). Suggestion: use 'extra energy' and comparative 'happier', and avoid repeating phrases.