Teachers— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be clear, grammatical and concise. Start with a direct topic sentence stating who the teacher was, then give two specific details (qualities and a concrete example of the advice). Use correct tense and simple linking words (for example, "she was caring and intelligent; for example,..."). Avoid unclear phrases and redundancies.

例: Yes. My favourite teacher was my high-school English teacher. She was very caring and knowledgeable, and she often stayed after class to help students with essays. For example, she gave me practical tips on how to structure an application essay, which helped me apply to university successfully.

提案: Answer directly then give one or two clear reasons using linking words like "because" or "so". Use natural phrasing ("I would not like to be a teacher") and correct grammar ("sacrifice your time and money"). Keep it to two or three sentences maximum.

例: No, I would not like to be a teacher. I think being a good teacher requires sacrificing a lot of time and sometimes money, because teachers often work outside school hours to support students.

提案: Give a direct, grammatically correct topic sentence and follow with a specific memory or example. Replace hesitations and vague words with precise descriptions (e.g., "Yes, I still remember my maths teacher from junior high because..."). Use linking words like "for example" or "for instance."

例: Yes, I still remember my junior-high math teacher. For example, she used practical problems to explain difficult concepts, which helped me understand algebra and build confidence in maths.

提案: Answer clearly and correct grammar: use present perfect or simple past appropriately. Provide a brief reason and a possible action. Avoid awkward phrasing like "couldn't in touch" and be specific: "I have not kept in touch because it was a long time ago; I could contact an old friend to find her."

例: No, I am not in contact with my primary-school teacher. It has been many years, so I would need to ask an old classmate for her current contact details if I wanted to reach her.

提案: Start with a direct statement about how she helped you, then give one specific example and a result. Use correct verb forms and linking words ("for example", "because", "so"). Replace vague phrases like "cheer me up" with "encouraged me" or "gave me practical help."

例: She helped me emotionally and practically when I applied to university. For example, she reviewed my personal statement and encouraged me when I felt anxious, so I felt more confident during the application process.

提案: Answer directly with a clear preference and give one concise reason. Avoid repetition and correct vocabulary ("memories", "primary"). Use a linking phrase like "because" and keep it to two sentences.

例: I prefer my high-school teachers because I have more memories and learned more from them. For example, high-school teachers gave me practical advice about studying and careers, which was very valuable.

× Absolutely, I had one when I studied high school.

✓ Absolutely, I had one when I was in high school.

Use of past progressive/continuous structure 'was in' is required to describe being at school in the past. 'Studied high school' is non-idiomatic; the correct expression is 'was in high school' or 'was at high school.' Replace with 'was in high school' for natural English.

× I the teacher that I like.

✓ She was the teacher that I liked.

Original sentence lacks a verb and subject agreement. Add the subject 'She' and past tense verb 'was' to match the earlier past context. Change 'like' to 'liked' to maintain past tense.

× She was crying and smart.

✓ She was caring and smart.

'Crying' is likely a wrong word choice here; it describes an action rather than a positive teacher quality. 'Caring' fits context better. Keep 'smart' as adjective; maintain parallel adjective structure.

× She told me a lot of things and gave me good advice how to study the university.

✓ She told me many things and gave me good advice on how to study at university.

Use 'many' with countable 'things.' 'Advice' requires the preposition 'on' for 'advice on how to...' and 'study the university' is incorrect; use 'study at university.'

× No, maybe because I feel that the good teacher you need to sacrifice your yourself in terms of time and some budget as well and you need to visit your student.

✓ No, maybe because I feel that a good teacher needs to sacrifice their time and some of their money, and they need to visit their students.

Multiple issues: article 'the' should be 'a' before 'good teacher'; subject-verb agreement and pronoun choice require third-person singular: 'needs.' Avoid reflexive 'your yourself'; use gender-neutral 'their.' Use 'some of their money' or 'some budget' and pluralize 'students.'

× Sure, I can memorize, uh, plenty of my teacher.

✓ Sure, I can remember plenty of my teachers.

'Memorize' is used incorrectly; 'remember' is the natural verb. 'Plenty of my teacher' requires plural 'teachers.'

× When I was a student in junior high school and high school, one of my teachers taught me a lot and gave me the experiences.

✓ When I was a student in junior high and high school, one of my teachers taught me a lot and gave me valuable experiences.

Remove redundant 'school' after 'junior high.' 'The experiences' is awkward; use 'valuable experiences' or 'many experiences.'

× Not at all, I think it was so long so I couldn't in touch with her recently.

✓ Not at all, I think it has been so long that I haven't been in touch with her recently.

Use present perfect 'has been' to relate past duration to present, and 'haven't been in touch' is the correct present perfect form. Also include 'that' for clarity.

× Maybe if I want to get in touch with her I need to ask my old friend better where she live currently.

✓ Maybe if I want to get in touch with her, I need to ask my old friend where she lives now.

Use comma after clause, 'ask my old friend where she lives now' is natural. 'Live' must be third person singular 'lives.' Remove 'better' which is unnecessary and awkward.

× During high school student I needed to apply to go to university.

✓ During high school, I needed to apply to university.

Remove 'student' which is unnecessary; use comma after 'During high school.' 'Apply to university' is more natural than 'apply to go to university.'

× In that time I was very stressful because I didn't know whether do I get connect, get accepted from university or not.

✓ At that time I was very stressed because I didn't know whether I would get accepted to university or not.

Use adjective 'stressed' not 'stressful.' Reorder embedded question: 'whether I would get accepted' and use 'to university.' Use future-in-past 'would' to express uncertainty about acceptance.

× She cheer me up and supportive.

✓ She cheered me up and was supportive.

Use past tense 'cheered' to match context and include auxiliary 'was' before 'supportive' to form correct predicate.

× To be honest, I had a few memory memory about my primary school prime primary teacher, but I gained a lot of experience and memory from my high school teachers so I prefer high school.

✓ To be honest, I have few memories of my primary school teacher, but I gained a lot of experience and memories from my high school teachers, so I prefer high school teachers.

Fix repetition 'memory memory' and 'prime primary.' Use 'have few memories of' (present perfect) to indicate limited recollection. Use plural 'memories' and adjust ending to 'prefer high school teachers' for clarity. Add comma before 'so.'