Tidiness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct verb forms and avoid filler sounds. Keep to 2–4 sentences.

例: Yes, I like to keep my bedroom tidy. For example, I make my bed and sweep the floor every morning, which helps me feel comfortable and ready for the day. When I have time, I also put clothes away to avoid clutter.

提案: Answer directly and use past tense consistently when talking about childhood. Provide one clear contrast and a specific example. Use linking words like 'however' or 'but' to show contrast.

例: I didn't keep my room tidy as a child. Instead, my mother usually cleaned it every weekend—she mopped the floor and wiped the windows—so I wasn't responsible for tidying until I was older.

提案: Organize your answer with a clear sequence and use correct vocabulary. Replace vague phrases like 'swap the dirty things' with specific actions (sort, throw away, wipe). Use linking words (first, then, finally) and finish the sentence.

例: First, I sort through papers and throw away any rubbish. Then I wipe the desk and sweep the floor. Finally, I organize books and stationery into drawers so everything is easy to find.

提案: Give a clear opinion and explain with two specific reasons using linking words. Avoid fragmented sentences and vague expressions—explain how tidiness affects mood and thinking.

例: Yes, I think it's necessary to be tidy because it improves your mood and reduces stress. Also, being organised helps you concentrate better and work more efficiently.

× I make up my beds and swept the floor every day this morning, uh, just give me the comfortable of the.

✓ I make up my bed and sweep the floor every morning, which just makes me comfortable.

The original mixes present simple and past simple incorrectly ('swept' past with habitual time). Use present simple for habitual actions: 'sweep'. Also 'beds' should be singular 'bed' to match 'my' when referring to one bedroom, and the phrase 'give me the comfortable of the' is ungrammatical; replace with 'makes me comfortable'. Suggestion: use consistent present simple for routines and clear noun phrases.

× Now I can keep my room tidy but as a child I won't do that and the responsibility of tidying the room is taken by mother.

✓ Now I can keep my room tidy, but as a child I didn't do that and the responsibility of tidying the room was taken by my mother.

Pronoun and reference errors: 'mother' should be 'my mother' to show possession. Also tense and auxiliary need fixing: 'won't' (will not) is wrong for past habit; use past simple 'didn't do that' and passive 'was taken' for past. Suggestion: indicate possession with 'my' and match past time with past tense verbs.

× She will clean it, mop the floor and cleaning the window every weekend and she talked to me to keep it clean.

✓ She cleaned it, mopped the floor and cleaned the windows every weekend, and she told me to keep it clean.

Mixed tense and verb form errors: 'will clean' implies future but context is past habit; use past simple 'cleaned' and 'mopped'. 'Cleaning the window' is a gerund where past simple 'cleaned' is needed. 'She talked to me' is awkward for 'told me'; use 'told me' in past. Suggestion: use consistent past simple for habitual past actions and correct verb forms.

× 1st I may swap The Dirty things.

✓ First, I remove the dirty things.

The verb 'swap' is incorrect in meaning and capitalization; 'may' suggests possibility rather than habitual action; use 'remove' or 'clear away' for intent. Also 'The Dirty' should be lowercase and 'things' needs context. Suggestion: choose a verb that matches the action and use consistent present simple for routines.

× Second, I will mop the floor and take the dirtiness away.

✓ Second, I mop the floor and remove the dirt.

Use present simple for habitual sequence: 'mop' and 'remove' rather than 'will'. 'Dirtiness' is awkward; 'dirt' is the correct noun. Suggestion: use precise nouns and present simple for routines.

× Then I will tidy up my wardrobe and.

✓ Then I tidy up my wardrobe and put things in order.

The sentence is incomplete and uses 'will' inconsistently for routines. Complete the idea by adding an object or phrase: 'put things in order' and use present simple for habitual actions. Suggestion: always finish coordinated clauses and use consistent tense.

× I think it's necessary to be tidy first.

✓ I think it is necessary to be tidy.

The word 'first' is unnecessary and causes awkwardness; present simple 'think' is fine. Suggestion: remove redundant adverbs and keep sentence concise.

× Uh, being tidy can give you. The upward mood.

✓ Being tidy can give you an uplifted mood.

The original is fragmented and uses 'upward mood' incorrectly. Combine into one sentence and use adjective 'uplifted' or noun phrase 'a better mood'. Suggestion: avoid sentence fragments and choose idiomatic expressions.

× Second, being tidy can make your mind.

✓ Second, being tidy can clear your mind.

'Make your mind' is incomplete and unidiomatic. Use the verb phrase 'clear your mind' to express that tidiness helps mental clarity. Suggestion: use established collocations like 'clear your mind' or 'organize your thoughts'.