Tidiness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is direct and natural but a bit short and repetitive. Improve by adding one specific reason and a linking phrase to make it more informative and fluent. Keep it under five sentences.

例: Yes, I do. I find clutter distracting, so I tidy up regularly to help me focus better when I'm working or relaxing.

提案: Your answer contains grammatical errors and is slightly confusing. Clarify the past situation, correct tense, and give a specific example of what you did as a child. Use a linking word to connect ideas.

例: I didn't have my own bedroom when I was a child, but I still helped keep the house tidy. For example, I would always put my toys away after playing and help my parents sweep the living room.

提案: The idea is clear but the answer has hesitations and minor grammar mistakes. Remove fillers, correct phrasing, and add a specific routine or method to make the response more precise and natural.

例: I tidy my study space after each session: I put books back on the shelf, clear my desk, and file any loose papers so it's ready for the next time I study.

提案: The answer repeats phrases and has grammatical errors. State your opinion clearly, avoid repetition, and support it with a specific reason or example. Use linking words to make it coherent.

例: Yes, I believe being tidy is important because it gives others a positive impression and shows that you are organized; for instance, a neat desk suggests you take your work seriously.

× Actually I don't have a room as a child, but I keep things tidy around my house, for example cleaning it because again, it bothers me.

✓ Actually I didn't have my own room as a child, but I kept things tidy around the house; for example, I would clean because it bothered me.

The original mixes present and past tenses and has awkward phrasing. Use past tense 'didn't have' and 'kept' to match 'as a child'. 'My own room' is clearer than 'a room'. Use a semicolon or separate clauses for clarity and add 'would' to describe habitual past actions. Also remove redundant 'again.'

× I keep my studies space tidy, uh, in a way of cleaning it every after I study.

✓ I keep my study space tidy by cleaning it after I study.

Wrong noun form 'studies space' should be 'study space'. 'In a way of cleaning' is ungrammatical — use 'by cleaning'. 'Every after I study' is incorrect sequence; use 'after I study'. Also remove filler 'uh' for clarity.

× Well, obviously at this necessary, necessary to be tidy because it reflects on your personality and how people and how people see you or look at you.

✓ Well, obviously it is necessary to be tidy because it reflects your personality and affects how people see you.

The phrase 'at this necessary' is incorrect; use 'it is necessary'. Repetition 'necessary, necessary' and 'how people and how people' should be removed. 'Reflects on your personality' is often simplified to 'reflects your personality'. 'See you or look at you' is redundant — use 'see you' or 'view you.'