Tidiness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and directly answer the question with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repeating phrases and filler words. Also correct minor grammar and use proper verb forms.

例: Yes, I generally like to keep things tidy. However, I can be messy at times because I get distracted when I am thinking, so my personal items often become disorganized. Nevertheless, I make an effort to tidy up once a week to keep my space functional.

提案: Answer directly and correct grammar mistakes (e.g., 'thus' → 'did'). Use linking words to show contrast and add a specific example of how your habits changed over time.

例: No, I didn’t keep my room tidy as a child because we had a maid who did those chores for us. However, as I grew older I developed the habit of cleaning a little every week, and now I vacuum and organize my desk every Sunday.

提案: Good structure and clear method. Improve by using more formal language (avoid 'gonna') and add a brief example of grouped items. Use linking words for clarity.

例: I group items by frequency of use: for example, I keep my laptop, notepad and pens on the desktop for daily tasks, while reference books and extra chargers are stored in a cabinet. This way I can access frequently used items quickly and keep clutter out of sight.

提案: Make the idea more natural and specific. Explain why tidiness matters and give a concrete result or example. Avoid awkward phrasing like 'sanitary health benefits are to be provided immediately.'

例: Yes, I think being tidy is important because it reduces the spread of germs and makes it easier to find things. For instance, keeping kitchen surfaces clean prevents pests and helps maintain good hygiene.

× I often do like keeping things tidy, but I am a messy person, I think a lot, so I tend to be more messy when it comes to my things.

✓ I often like keeping things tidy, but I am a messy person; I think a lot, so I tend to be messier when it comes to my things.

Unnecessary auxiliary 'do' used with stative verb 'like' in present simple; use 'like' alone. Use comparative adjective 'messier' instead of adverb 'more messy'. Replace comma with semicolon to separate independent clauses for clarity. Suggestion: Remove unnecessary 'do' for habitual actions and use comparative adjective forms.

× But I do need to be tidy and I want to see, I wanna.

✓ But I do need to be tidy and I want to, I want to see progress.

The original 'I want to see, I wanna' is incomplete and uses informal contraction 'wanna' which is inappropriate in formal responses. Provide a complete clause showing the object of 'see'. Suggestion: Complete the sentence with the object (e.g., 'progress') and avoid colloquial contractions in formal speech.

× No, actually we had a maid who thus those things for me.

✓ No, actually we had a maid who did those things for me.

Incorrect verb 'thus' is likely a mispronunciation or wrong word; use past tense 'did' to match 'had a maid' and indicate completed action. 'Who did those things for me' is natural. Suggestion: Use correct past tense verb 'did' for actions performed in the past.

× So growing up I did not have that urge to do most of the cleaning.

✓ So growing up I did not have the urge to do most of the cleaning.

'That urge' is acceptable but 'the urge' is more natural here; no progressive present needed because speaker refers to past state. Sentence otherwise fine; simplified article improves collocation. Suggestion: Use 'the urge' for common expressions like 'have the urge to'.

× But slowly as I am maturing, I tend to do some cleaning.

✓ But as I have been maturing, I have started to do some cleaning.

Mix of present progressive 'am maturing' and simple present 'tend to' is awkward. Use present perfect continuous 'have been maturing' or present perfect 'have started' to express change over time and present relevance. Suggestion: Use consistent tense to describe gradual changes (present perfect or present perfect continuous).

× That's a nice question.

✓ That's a good question.

'Nice question' is not ungrammatical but 'good question' is more idiomatic in this context. No -ing form error; suggestion improves collocation. Suggestion: Use common collocations for natural speech.

× As for my work or study area, I tend to group my things according to how I use them.

✓ As for my work or study area, I tend to group my things according to how I use them.

This sentence is grammatically correct. 'Tend to group' with verb and -ing are used appropriately. No correction needed. Suggestion: None.

× So if I'm gonna be using them immediately, I'll be putting them on the desktop, while if I don't need any of those things, I put them on my cabinet.

✓ So if I'm going to use them immediately, I put them on the desktop, while if I don't need any of those things, I put them in my cabinet.

'Gonna' is informal; replace with 'going to'. 'Be using' is unnecessary progressive for general plan; 'use' is sufficient. Use 'in my cabinet' rather than 'on my cabinet' for typical storage. Maintain simple present for habitual actions. Suggestion: Avoid colloquial forms and use correct preposition 'in' for enclosed storage.

× Do you think that it is necessary to be tidy?

✓ Do you think it is necessary to be tidy?

Removing 'that' is more natural in this question form, though original is not strictly wrong. Both accepted, but streamlined version is preferable. Suggestion: Omit optional 'that' in such questions for natural flow.

× Yes, I believe that being tidy usually means that sanitary health benefits are to be provided immediately.

✓ Yes, I believe that being tidy usually brings sanitary and health benefits immediately.

Phrase 'sanitary health benefits are to be provided' is awkward and passive. Use active construction 'brings ... benefits' and combine 'sanitary' and 'health' as adjectives. 'Immediately' can follow 'benefits'. Suggestion: Use active voice and natural adjective-noun collocations (e.g., 'sanitary and health benefits').