Tidiness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Reduce repetition and split into a clear topic sentence plus one or two supporting reasons. Use smoother linking and more natural collocations (e.g., “a clean environment” → “a tidy home”) and avoid overlong phrases. Keep it within 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes, I enjoy keeping my home tidy. It helps prevent illness and also makes me feel more relaxed and comfortable.

提案: Give a concise past-tense topic sentence, then give specific habitual actions with correct tense and smoother linking. Avoid hesitations and repeated fragments. Limit to 2–3 sentences and correct verb forms (e.g., “made me” → “was”).

例: Yes, I did. My mother taught me good habits, so every morning I would make my bed and sweep the floor as part of my daily routine.

提案: Be specific and accurate about actions, use correct vocabulary (e.g., “dust the desk”, “mop the floor”), and organise ideas with linking words (firstly, then, finally). Avoid vague phrases and fix grammar. Keep answers to 2–3 clear sentences.

例: I keep my study tidy by clearing papers from my desk and dusting it regularly. Then I sweep or mop the floor and occasionally wipe surfaces with disinfectant.

提案: State your opinion clearly, then provide one or two concise reasons with natural phrasing. Correct small errors (e.g., “makes me feel” not “makes 1 to feel”) and avoid repeating earlier points verbatim—use varied wording.

例: Yes, I think being tidy is necessary because it reduces the risk of illness and creates a calmer, more pleasant environment to live or work in.

× I like I like a clean environment, so I like keeping my place clean because it helps to prevent infection and other communicable diseases and happily makes one feel more relaxed and comfortable.

✓ I like a clean environment, so I keep my place clean because it helps prevent infections and other communicable diseases and makes me feel more relaxed and comfortable.

Repeated phrase 'I like I like' is a redundancy and creates a sentence structure error (Grammar Problem Type ID 26). Also 'helps to prevent infection' is acceptable but 'helps prevent infections' is more natural and plural 'infections' fits. 'Happily makes one feel' is awkward; replace with 'makes me feel' to match first person. Suggestion: remove duplicate words, use consistent first-person pronouns, and pluralize countable nouns when generalizing.

× When I was a child, one of the things my mom taught us is is how to keep our environment clean.

✓ When I was a child, one of the things my mom taught us was how to keep our environment clean.

The sentence used present 'is' after a past-tense main clause 'my mom taught us'; this is a tense inconsistency and repetition 'is is' (Grammar Problem Type IDs 5 and 26). Use past tense 'was' to match 'taught'. Remove duplicate 'is'. Suggestion: keep tense consistent within the clause and eliminate repeated words.

× For example, when I wake up from sleep, I always dress my bed and sweep the house.

✓ For example, when I wake up, I always make my bed and sweep the house.

'Wake up from sleep' is wordy; 'wake up' is natural (Grammar Problem Type ID 6). 'Dress my bed' is incorrect collocation; the correct verb is 'make my bed' (Grammar Problem Type ID 13/26). Suggestion: use common collocations (make the bed) and simpler phrasing.

× This makes me this has been my daily routine when I was young.

✓ This was my daily routine when I was young.

The original mixes present 'This makes me' with present perfect 'this has been' and then past time 'when I was young', causing tense inconsistency (Grammar Problem Type ID 5 and 6). Use simple past 'was' to match the time reference. Suggestion: choose a tense that matches the time phrase and remove redundant fragments.

× There are so many ways one can keep the work or study space clean.

✓ There are many ways one can keep a work or study space clean.

'So many' is informal but acceptable; change to 'many' for formality. 'The work or study space' implies a specific space; 'a work or study space' is more general and fits the context (Grammar Problem Type IDs 22 and 26). Suggestion: use articles that match general vs specific meaning.

× Firstly you arrange the tables and dust the derties in on the table.

✓ First, you arrange the tables and dust the dirt on the table.

'Firstly' is acceptable but 'First' is more concise. 'Derties' is a misspelling of 'dirties' but the intended word is 'dirt' (noun) (Grammar Problem Type ID 11/13). 'Dust the dirt' is slightly odd but acceptable; better: 'dust the tables' or 'wipe away the dirt on the table'. Suggestion: correct spelling, use the correct noun or verb collocation: 'dust the tables' or 'wipe the dirt off the table'.

× However, one can as well mob the work environment and use disinfectant to.

✓ However, one can also mop the work area and use disinfectant.

'As well' placement is awkward; use 'also' after the subject (Grammar Problem Type ID 4 and 16). 'Mob' is a misspelling of 'mop'. 'Work environment' can be 'work area' for clarity. 'Use disinfectant to' is incomplete; remove 'to' (Grammar Problem Type ID 26). Suggestion: fix spelling, place adverbs properly, and remove dangling infinitives.

× Yes, it is very important for one to be neat because it helps to prevent infection and equally makes 1 to feel more relaxed and comfortable.

✓ Yes, it is very important for one to be neat because it helps prevent infections and makes one feel more relaxed and comfortable.

The sentence mixed numeric '1' with pronoun 'one'—use 'one' consistently (Grammar Problem Type ID 12). 'Helps to prevent infection' changed to 'helps prevent infections' for natural phrasing and plural noun (Grammar Problem Type ID 14/13). 'Equally makes one to feel' is incorrect: 'makes one feel' (no 'to') (Grammar Problem Type ID 8/26). Suggestion: use consistent pronouns, correct verb patterns after 'make', and use plural for general countable nouns.