Tidiness— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is relevant and communicates the main idea, but it is slightly repetitive and has some grammatical issues. Improve by using a clear topic sentence, correct grammar, and one or two specific supporting details linked with a connective. Keep the response concise (max 3–4 sentences).

例: Yes, I do. Keeping my space tidy helps me stay focused and reduces distractions, so I can work more efficiently. For example, when my desk is organized I finish tasks faster because I can find everything I need quickly.

提案: The response answers the question directly but is short and could be improved with a linking phrase and a specific detail or short example. Correct minor collocation and tense usage and expand a little to show reasoning or contrast.

例: No, not really. As a child my room was usually messy, so my parents often asked me to tidy up. For instance, I was reminded every weekend to put away toys and fold my clothes, which I didn’t enjoy at the time.

× When I keep things tidy it helps me remain focused on what I want to, what I have to, and it helps me comfortable and organized.

✓ When I keep things tidy, it helps me remain focused on what I want to do and what I have to do, and it helps me feel comfortable and organized.

The original sentence misuses the adjective 'comfortable' where a verb phrase is required after 'helps me'. Use the verb 'feel' to link the subject to the adjective: 'helps me feel comfortable'. Also the verb 'do' is omitted after 'what I want to' and 'what I have to'; include 'do' to complete these clauses. Add a comma after the introductory clause 'When I keep things tidy' for correct punctuation and clarity.

× No, not really. When I was a child my room was quite messy so I was always told by my parents to clean my room.

✓ No, not really. When I was a child my room was quite messy, so my parents always told me to clean it.

The original sentence is grammatically understandable but word order and passive construction are awkward. Use active voice 'my parents always told me' instead of passive 'I was always told by my parents' for natural speech. Also replace the repeated noun 'my room' with the pronoun 'it' to avoid redundancy and add a comma before 'so' linking two independent clauses. This keeps the past tense consistent and improves fluency.