Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be careful with verb tense consistency and minor grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence in past tense (e.g., “Yes, I loved going to parks as a child.”). Avoid redundancy (“I love going to parks as a child” repeated idea) and correct articles and plural forms (e.g., “a picnic,” “the swing and the slide” or “swings and slides”). Use one or two specific supporting details and a linking word to connect them.

例: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. For example, I spent hours on the swings and slides with my friends, and my parents often took us on picnics at the weekends, so I have many happy memories of playing outdoors.

提案: Correct word choice and pronunciation in spoken answers; ensure clarity and coherence. Use correct words (“breathe” not “bread”; “They’re” or “They are” instead of unclear punctuation). Avoid contradictory fragments and refine the idea: say why you still like parks now and provide a specific example. Use a linking word to add detail.

例: Yes, I do. They are a great place to breathe fresh air, and they’re perfect for meeting other people; for instance, I often chat with neighbors while walking my dog, which has created many pleasant memories.

提案: Be concise and avoid awkward phrasing. Use clearer grammar and linking words to support your opinion (e.g., “because” to give a reason). Correct collocations: say “it would not make much difference to me” and be specific about which other improvements you mean (e.g., “upgrading public transport” or “building affordable housing”). Limit to 2–3 sentences.

例: To be honest, I don't think we need more parks in my city because I rarely visit them. Instead, the city should prioritise upgrading public transport and improving roads, which would benefit more residents.

提案: Improve grammar and word choice and make sentences more natural. Use correct verb forms and articles (e.g., “to go jogging” or “for jogging”; “a big lake” not “Big Lake” unless it’s a proper name). Use a linking word to connect reasons (e.g., “because” or “so”). Provide one specific activity and one detail about the park.

例: I would really like to visit Nature Park, which has just opened near my house. I plan to go jogging or take walks there to relax because I heard it has beautiful gardens and a large lake.

× Absolutely. I love going to parks as a child.

✓ Absolutely. I loved going to parks as a child.

The question asks about past experience as a child, so the past tense should be used. Using present tense 'love' is inconsistent with 'as a child'. Change to 'loved' to match past timeframe. Suggestion: Use past tense verbs when referring to childhood or past habits.

× I remember spending hours on the swings and slide with my friends and my parents would often take me for picnic during the weekend.

✓ I remember spending hours on the swings and slides with my friends, and my parents would often take me on picnics during the weekend.

There are two issues: 'slide' should be plural 'slides' to match 'swings', and 'for picnic' is incorrect preposition and noun form. Use 'on picnics' (preposition 'on' plus plural 'picnics'). Also add a comma and conjunction for clarity. Suggestion: Use parallel plural nouns for lists and correct prepositions for activities ('go on a picnic', 'go on picnics').

× I think it is a great place to spend quality time with family or friends.

✓ I think they are great places to spend quality time with family or friends.

The student previously referred to parks (plural), so the pronoun and noun should match in number. 'It' and 'a great place' suggest singular; change to 'they are great places' to agree with plural 'parks'. Suggestion: Ensure pronouns and descriptions agree in number with the noun they refer to.

× Yes I do, they are a great place to bread in some fresh air.

✓ Yes I do. They are a great place to breathe in some fresh air.

The verb 'bread' is incorrect; correct verb is 'breathe'. Also punctuation: separate sentences or use semicolon; here a period is appropriate. 'Breathe' is the base verb needed after 'to'. Suggestion: Check verb spelling and use the base verb after 'to' for infinitive forms.

× Bugs the perfect place to meet other people, so I have lots of great memories from those times.

✓ Parks are the perfect place to meet other people, so I have lots of great memories from that time.

'Bugs' is likely a typo for 'Parks' and the sentence structure lacks a verb ('are'). Also referential consistency: use 'that time' or 'those times' but match singular/plural context. Here 'that time' or 'those times' both OK; corrected to 'that time' to match earlier general statement. Suggestion: Proofread for typos and ensure sentences include a verb and consistent references.

× I don't think we need more parks in my city to be honest.

✓ I don't think we need more parks in my city, to be honest.

Main issue is punctuation: add comma before 'to be honest'. The modal 'don't think we need' is acceptable. Adjust punctuation for clarity. Suggestion: Use commas to set off parenthetical phrases like 'to be honest'.

× I rarely visit parks myself so it would not affect much different to me.

✓ I rarely visit parks myself, so it would not make much difference to me.

The phrase 'affect much different to me' is ungrammatical. Use 'make much difference' or 'affect me much'. 'Make much difference' is idiomatic. Also add comma before 'so'. Suggestion: Learn common collocations: 'make a difference', 'make much difference' and proper sentence punctuation.

× I think the city should prioritise other improvements such as upgrading public transport or building.

✓ I think the city should prioritise other improvements such as upgrading public transport or improving buildings.

'Or building' is incomplete; needs a verb or noun phrase. Changed to 'improving buildings' to parallel 'upgrading public transport'. Suggestion: Ensure items in a list have parallel structure and are complete phrases.

× I would really like to visit Nature Park.

✓ I would really like to visit Nature Park.

This sentence is grammatically correct. No change needed. Suggestion: None.

× It is a park that just opened near my house.

✓ It is a park that just opened near my house.

This sentence is grammatically correct. 'Just opened' correctly uses past tense to indicate recent action. Suggestion: None.

× I would go there to jogging or take a walk to relax my mind.

✓ I would go there to jog or take a walk to relax my mind.

After 'to' (the infinitive marker) the base verb 'jog' should be used, not the -ing form 'jogging'. Suggestion: Use the infinitive form 'to + base verb' when expressing purpose: 'to jog', 'to relax'.

× I have heard it has beautiful gardens and a Big Lake.

✓ I have heard it has beautiful gardens and a big lake.

Capitalizing 'Big Lake' is unnecessary unless it is a proper name. In this context it appears to be a common noun, so use lowercase 'big lake'. Also maintain consistent capitalization. Suggestion: Reserve capitalization for proper nouns; use lowercase for descriptive phrases.