Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make the answer more natural and grammatically correct by using a clear topic sentence, correcting tense and article errors, and adding one specific supporting detail. Limit to 2–3 sentences and use a linking word if needed.

例: Yes — I loved going to parks as a child. My dad often took me there to play games and have picnics, and I especially remember flying kites on sunny afternoons.

提案: Give a direct topic sentence, fix grammar and word choice (e.g., 'because my child wants' and 'play games'), and add a brief specific reason. Use a linking word for clarity and keep it concise.

例: Not really — I rarely go to parks now. I usually only go when my child wants to play there, because I prefer other activities like going to the gym.

提案: Provide a clear topic sentence and correct unclear phrasing (e.g., 'closer the park to my house') and filler words. Add one specific benefit of having more parks and use a linking word to connect ideas.

例: Yes, I would — I think more parks close to home would be very useful. For example, if a park were nearby I might visit often to walk or let my child play.

提案: Make the response more natural and accurate by correcting grammar ('I wish I could go'), vocabulary ('parks' and 'parks/forests' not 'barks'), and providing one specific detail about what attracts you to those parks. Limit to 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes — I would love to visit national parks in Malaysia and Indonesia. I saw documentaries showing lush rainforests and unique wildlife, so I want to see the trails and wildlife in person.

× It was amazing days.

✓ They were amazing days.

Subject and verb tense: 'It' is incorrect with plural noun 'days'. Use plural pronoun 'They' and plural verb 'were' for past tense. Suggestion: refer to plural noun with plural pronoun and past tense verb: 'They were amazing days.'

× In fact sometimes I have to go there because of my child wants to go to the parks to have fun and play with the games.

✓ In fact sometimes I have to go there because my child wants to go to the park to have fun and play games.

Redundant 'because of' plus clause is incorrect: use 'because' before a clause with a subject and verb. Use singular 'park' when speaking generally and omit unnecessary article 'the' before 'games'. Suggestion: use 'because my child wants...' and 'play games.'

× Otherwise I will not go there at all.

✓ Otherwise I will not go there at all.

Sentence is grammatically correct and matches the future meaning; no change needed.

× I would like to see more because the closer the back to my house the better and I might go there, umm, many times.

✓ I would like to see more because the closer they are to my house the better, and I might go there many times.

Word choice and agreement: 'back' is incorrect; use 'they' to refer to 'parks' and plural verb agreement. Place commas appropriately and remove filler 'umm'. Suggestion: use 'the closer they are to my house' and avoid hesitation words in formal responses.

× I wish I can go to parks that are in Malaysia and in Indonesia as well, because I saw some documentary about those countries.

✓ I wish I could go to parks in Malaysia and Indonesia as well, because I saw a documentary about those countries.

In wishes about present or future unreal situations, use 'could' rather than 'can'. Use 'a documentary' for a singular countable noun. Also simplify 'parks that are in' to 'parks in'. Suggestion: use 'I wish I could...' and correct article usage.

× They have amazing and astonishing barks.

✓ They have amazing and astonishing parks.

Word choice error: 'barks' is incorrect and likely a typo for 'parks'. Replace with correct noun 'parks'. Ensure adjective order is acceptable; both adjectives 'amazing' and 'astonishing' are redundant—consider using one. Suggestion: 'They have amazing parks.'