Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve grammar (use past tense and correct articles), reduce filler words, and make answers concise with one clear topic sentence plus one supporting detail. Use linking words such as “because” or “and” to connect ideas. Pronunciation of small words and plurals should be clearer.

例: Yes, I enjoyed going to parks as a child because I used to play there with my friends. For example, we often played hide-and-seek and rode on swings every weekend.

提案: Use present simple for habits, avoid repetition, and structure sentence with a clear reason using linking words like “because” or “so”. Keep to two to three concise sentences and include a specific detail about what you do in the park.

例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they help me relax when I feel bored. I often sit on a bench, watch people and trees, and remember happy childhood memories.

提案: Correct grammar (use modal 'would like' or 'yes, I would') and use clearer structure: state your opinion then give a specific reason with a linking word such as “because” or “so”. Remove filler sounds and avoid repeating words.

例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because there are only two parks at the moment. More parks would give families and children more places to relax and exercise.

提案: Be specific about the park and use correct verb forms (e.g., ‘I have seen it on Facebook’). Use linking words like “because” to explain why you want to visit and give one concrete detail about what you expect to do there. Limit to two sentences.

例: Yes, I would like to visit a famous park in Kathmandu because I have seen many beautiful photos and videos of it on Facebook and YouTube. I hope to walk around the gardens and take photos of the views.

× Yes, I like going to park as a children.

✓ Yes, I liked going to parks as a child.

The student used singular 'park' and plural 'children' incorrectly. 'Children' is plural and must match 'a' and singular; use 'child' for singular. Also when referring generally to parks, plural 'parks' is appropriate. Additionally, tense should match the past time reference ('as a child') so use 'liked'. Suggestions: use 'a child' for singular, use 'parks' when speaking generally, and match tense to time reference.

× When I was a child, I was always enjoying in park.

✓ When I was a child, I always enjoyed going to the park.

The continuous past 'was always enjoying' is awkward for habitual past actions; use simple past 'always enjoyed'. Preposition 'in' with 'park' is incorrect here; use 'going to the park' or 'at the park'. Also include the definite article 'the' when referring to a specific type of place in this context. Suggestions: use simple past for habitual actions (always enjoyed) and correct preposition/article: 'going to the park'.

× I was playing in park with my friends, uh, like.

✓ I played in the park with my friends.

The past continuous 'was playing' is acceptable but simpler past 'played' better matches 'when I was a child' as a habitual action. Missing article before 'park' and unnecessary filler 'uh, like' should be removed. Use 'the park' for a specific place. Suggestions: use simple past for repeated past events and include articles: 'the park'.

× Yes I love going to park as of now also because when I get bored, when I get bored then I'm going park and sitting and enjoying the enjoying view and remembering my past.

✓ Yes, I love going to the park now because when I get bored I go to the park, sit, enjoy the view, and remember my past.

Missing articles before 'park' and repeated phrase 'when I get bored' should be condensed. 'I'm going park' is ungrammatical; use 'I go to the park'. 'Enjoying the enjoying view' is redundant and incorrect; use 'enjoy the view'. Suggestions: include 'the' before 'park', use simple present 'I go' for habitual actions, and avoid redundancy.

× Yes, I love the park That's why I uh, I see more parks in my city.

✓ Yes, I love parks. That's why I want to see more parks in my city.

Original mixes singular and plural awkwardly. 'I love the park' implies a specific park; context asks about seeing more parks in the city, so plural 'parks' fits. 'I see more parks' is incorrect for the intended meaning; use 'I want to see' or 'I would like to have'. Suggestions: match singular/plural consistently and use correct verbs to express desire ('want to see').

× Our city have uh, uh, like only two parks only.

✓ Our city has only two parks.

Subject 'city' is singular so verb must be 'has' not 'have'. Remove filler words and duplicate 'only'. Suggestions: ensure subject-verb agreement: singular subject takes singular verb 'has'; remove unnecessary fillers.

× That's why it is.

✓ That's why it's like that.

Original 'That's why it is' is grammatically possible but unnatural here. A clearer structure is 'That's why it's like that' to explain reason. Keep contractions for spoken style. Suggestions: use natural phrasing to express cause and effect.

× Yes, I want to visit Kathmandu for a park, which is really nice.

✓ Yes, I want to visit Kathmandu to see a park that is really nice.

Phrase 'visit Kathmandu for a park' is awkward; use purpose infinitive 'to see'. The relative clause should be 'a park that is really nice' rather than 'which' in this spoken context. Ensure infinitive expresses intent. Suggestions: use 'to see' for purpose and 'that' for defining clauses.

× I always seen in like Facebook face, YouTube, Tiktoks.

✓ I have always seen it on Facebook, YouTube, and TikTok.

'Seen' is past participle and requires an auxiliary: use present perfect 'have seen' for experience up to now. Preposition should be 'on' for online platforms. Use correct platform name 'TikTok' (singular) and list properly. Suggestions: use present perfect 'have seen' for experiences and use 'on' with online platforms.

× That's why I I think I want to go in that park and I also enjoying that moment.

✓ That's why I think I want to go to that park and also enjoy that moment.

Remove duplicate 'I'. Use 'go to' with places rather than 'go in'. 'I also enjoying' is incorrect—use base verb 'enjoy' for future/intent statements or 'will enjoy' to indicate prediction. Here present 'enjoy' after 'want to' is correct. Suggestions: use 'go to' for destinations, avoid duplicate words, and use correct verb form after 'want to' (base form 'enjoy').