Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is clear and relevant but a bit long and slightly repetitive. Start with a concise topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using a linking word. Also correct small grammar issues (e.g., use “a top view” or “a bird’s-eye view” and avoid repeating phrases like “which I love it”).

例: I love taking pictures of different views. For example, I often shoot landscapes and bird’s-eye views because they show the full perspective of an environment, and I enjoy capturing patterns and light across wide scenes.

提案: Good attempt to compare both, but the reasons are vague and one sentence is grammatically awkward. Use a clear topic sentence, then contrast with linking words (for example/whereas) and give specific visual details that justify your preference.

例: I prefer both urban and rural views. For example, urban scenes offer dramatic buildings and interesting street life, whereas rural views provide wide fields and natural textures that are calming and photo-worthy.

提案: The idea is understandable but the response is repetitive and has grammar issues (use plural 'countries', avoid repeated short fragments). Begin with a clear statement, then give one specific reason with an example. Use linking words like because or so.

例: I prefer views in other countries because they often feel more open and varied. For example, when I travel I find wide beaches and expansive countryside that give me space to relax and take different kinds of photos.

× I do love taking pictures in different views usually in landscape also it can be top view wherein you can see whole perspective of the environment which I love it.

✓ I really love taking pictures of different views, usually landscapes; sometimes I take top-down shots where you can see the whole perspective of the environment, which I love.

The sentence has several issues. 'in different views' is better as 'of different views' (preposition use - ID 11). 'usually in landscape' should be 'usually landscapes' (noun form and plurality - ID 1 and 22). 'it can be top view' should be 'sometimes I take top-down shots' (verb usage and noun form; using gerund/verb phrases properly - ID 8). The clause 'wherein you can see whole perspective' needs the article 'the whole perspective' (article error - ID 22). The final 'which I love it' has a redundant pronoun 'it' and should be 'which I love' (pronoun error/ sentence structure - ID 12 and 26). Suggestion: break into shorter clauses, use correct prepositions, plural nouns where needed, and remove redundant pronouns.

× Actually I prefer both areas, the urban and the rural areas.

✓ Actually, I prefer both types of areas: urban and rural.

'Both areas, the urban and the rural areas' is repetitive and awkward. Use 'both types of areas' or simply 'both urban and rural areas' (pronoun/word choice and sentence structure - ID 12 and 26). Also add a comma after 'Actually' for natural speech pacing.

× For urban areas it has a developed economy and you can see the beautiful structures, while for rural areas you can see the plantations, the nature.

✓ Urban areas often have developed economies and impressive buildings, while rural areas offer plantations and natural scenery.

'For urban areas it has a developed economy' is ungrammatical because the subject is mismatched ('it' refers to nothing); this is a sentence structure and subject-verb problem (ID 26 and 27). Replace with 'Urban areas often have developed economies' to match subject and verb. 'the beautiful structures' is better as 'impressive buildings' and 'the nature' should be 'natural scenery' (article and word choice errors - ID 22 and 13).

× I actually prefer in other countries because in my country it seems like a narrow place for me, while in other country it's very wide and spacious.

✓ I actually prefer other countries because my country feels a bit crowded to me, while other countries seem wide and spacious.

'Prefer in other countries' should be 'prefer other countries' (preposition error - ID 11). 'in my country it seems like a narrow place for me' is awkward; use 'my country feels a bit crowded to me' (article and sentence structure - ID 22 and 26). 'in other country' should be 'other countries' (singular/plural and article errors - ID 1 and 22). Also adjust tense/verb forms for natural expression.

× I can take, I can go unwind.

✓ I could relax and enjoy myself there.

The original 'I can take, I can go unwind' is ungrammatical and unclear; 'take' lacks an object and 'go unwind' is informal and missing structure. This is a sentence structure error (ID 26). Use a clear verb phrase such as 'relax and enjoy myself' or 'unwind' with appropriate auxiliary ('could' or 'can') depending on intended nuance.