Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and organize your answer. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific examples with linking words. Pay attention to grammar (article use, plural/singular, word order) and avoid filler words like “yeah.”

例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views. For example, I often shoot sunrises because the changing colors are very striking, and I also like night skies when stars are visible, which creates dramatic photos.

提案: Provide a clear topic sentence and then support it with specific, well-linked details. Correct grammar (use singular/plural, articles) and avoid vague phrases. Use linking words like “because” and “for example” to structure the answer.

例: I prefer urban views because I live in Shanghai and enjoy the skyline. For example, the contrast between tall buildings and pockets of trees against the sky often makes for striking photographs.

提案: Give a direct answer first, then explain with concise reasons and specific examples. Avoid repetition and correct grammatical errors (use correct tense, articles, and sentence connectors). Use linking words such as “because” or “for example.”

例: I prefer views in my own country because I find many diverse landscapes across China. For example, the countryside offers peaceful rivers and fields, while cities like Shanghai have impressive skylines, so both urban and rural scenes are appealing.

× Yes, I like to take different pictures of views such like the sky, just one the sunrise or the night with some a bright as some stars that are brightening. Yeah.

✓ Yes, I like taking different pictures of views, such as the sky, the sunrise, or the night with bright stars.

Use of 'like' followed by a gerund is more natural: 'like taking' not 'like to take' (both are acceptable but gerund fits here). 'Such like' is incorrect; use 'such as'. Remove redundant words ('just one the') and fix article usage and word order. 'some a bright as some stars that are brightening' is awkward; 'bright stars' is concise. Improve fluency and clarity.

× I prefer views in urban areas because I live in Shanghai. There's many tall buildings and some towers and I think these ones with these huge amount of trees consist with the sky and the environment to a very nice picture.

✓ I prefer views in urban areas because I live in Shanghai. There are many tall buildings and some towers, and I think these, together with the trees and the sky, make a very nice picture.

'There's many' is incorrect; use plural 'There are many' for plural noun (There be issue). 'These ones with these huge amount of trees consist with the sky and the environment to a very nice picture' contains structure and word choice errors: 'huge amount of trees' should be 'a large number of trees' or simply 'the trees'. Use 'make a very nice picture' instead of 'consist with ... to a very nice picture'. Reorder phrase for clarity.

× I prefer views in my own country or in other countries? Student: Hmm. I think in my country, although I didn't see many different views from other countries, but in my country in China, the views are very beautiful.

✓ I think in my country. Although I haven't seen many views from other countries, in China the views are very beautiful.

Mixing past simple 'didn't see' with present preference causes tense inconsistency; use present perfect 'haven't seen' to indicate life experience up to now (Present tense issue). Also remove redundant repetition 'in my country in China' and streamline sentence.

× When you go to some countryside or just in my city, there's many beautiful views.

✓ When you go to the countryside or even in my city, there are many beautiful views.

Again 'there's many' should be 'there are many' since 'many views' is plural (There be issue). Use 'the countryside' (not 'some countryside') for general reference. 'Even' clarifies 'or just'.