Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and avoid hesitation and repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Use correct grammar (e.g. "different views" not "a different views") and avoid filler words like "umm."

例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views because each angle can highlight a new detail. For example, a low angle can make a building look more dramatic, whereas a wide shot shows the whole landscape.

提案: Answer directly and provide specific reasons with linking words. Avoid circular statements and unclear phrases like "picture that you're taking off." Keep it to one clear topic sentence and one or two supporting points.

例: I like both urban and rural views. Urban scenes offer interesting architecture and busy streets, while rural views give peaceful landscapes and natural colours, so I choose depending on the mood I want to capture.

提案: Give a clear, concise reason and avoid redundant phrasing. Use linking words (e.g. "because", "therefore") and specific details or examples to support your preference. Fix grammar: "views from other countries" and shorter, more natural sentences.

例: I prefer views from other countries because they offer new and rare sights I may only see once. For instance, seeing a historic market abroad or a famous skyline feels unique compared with familiar local scenery.

× Yes, I do really like taking pictures of different views because umm, each angle has different meaning as well, so I'm taking a good Taking a different views can also have a different meaning.

✓ Yes, I really like taking pictures of different views because each angle has a different meaning, so taking different views can also convey different meanings.

Errors: repetition, incorrect article usage and noun number, and awkward participle phrase. 'Each angle has different meaning' needs the indefinite article 'a' and singular noun 'meaning'. 'Taking a different views' mixes singular article 'a' with plural 'views' — change to 'taking different views'. Remove repeated fragments and 'umm' for clarity. Suggestion: use 'each' with singular countable noun and match articles and number; keep participle phrases parallel and concise.

× I prefer both views because, again, all views are important because it shows a different meaning of the picture that you're taking off.

✓ I prefer both types of views because all views are important; they can show different meanings in the pictures you take.

Errors: wrong preposition 'taking off' and pronoun-verb agreement. 'Taking off' is incorrect in this context — use 'take'. Also 'it shows' refers to 'views' (plural) so use 'they can show'. Suggestion: replace 'taking off' with 'take', ensure pronouns agree with plural nouns, and use 'types of views' for clarity.

× I prefer views from the other countries because maybe I can only go there once in a lifetime and while in my country I'm living here, I'm staying here, I will grow old here. So that's why I prefer other countries view.

✓ I prefer views from other countries because I may only go there once in my life, while I will live and grow old in my own country. That's why I prefer views of other countries.

Errors: incorrect prepositions and article use: 'from the other countries' should be 'from other countries'; 'once in a lifetime' is idiomatic but better as 'once in my life' here. Redundant present continuous phrases 'I'm living here, I'm staying here' are awkward; use 'I will live and grow old in my own country'. Also 'other countries view' needs plural or possessive: 'views of other countries'. Suggestion: simplify and use correct prepositions/articles and consistent tense to express contrast.